Earlier this year I unexpectedly lost my father. Anyone who’s lost someone close to them knows how hard it is to deal with the pain and suffering. Everyone reacts differently in these situations, but I found myself spending long periods staring at the TV without taking any of it in. The first few months felt like I was living in a fog and I struggled to be motivated for day to day life.
During this period I received the usual messages from friends and family to ‘take care of myself’ and ‘keep busy’, but I wasn’t motivated and didn’t realize just how important that advice could actually be.
Eventually, I decided the time had come to stop gazing into the distance and try and take up a new hobby. I was never very good at sports or art but my father was good with his hands and I inherited a lot of old tools from his workshop.
I did a bit of research online and thought I’d try my hand at welding. I’ve always liked solid metal homeware and thought it would be great if I could make some, although I never actually thought I would be able to do it. I didn’t know where to start, I really didn’t know anything at all about welding. After researching online I found some great information by the guys at Kings of Welding and sent them an email explaining my situation and asking for some more tips and advice. They were really helpful in getting me started with my first welder and I’ve been in regular contact with them over the past few weeks whilst learning to improve my welds.
Much to my surprise, it’s actually a lot easier than I expected. But more importantly, I feel much better about life. Most evenings now I spend a bit of time in my garage welding a few bits and pieces together trying to make something that’s either practical or would make a cool gift for someone. It’s really improved my confidence as I’m proud of the things I’ve made, despite the weld quality being far from perfect! Keeping busy has stopped those long destructive spells of sitting there with a drink without motivation not knowing what to do.
Everyone deals with things in their own way and in their own time, but I hope other people can learn to start a new hobby like I did to help deal with bereavement. I know that taking up a new hobby has been great for me and it makes me wonder why I didn’t try and do something like this sooner. It’s also really helped knowing that dad’s tools have gone to good use. I hope this article can help anyone else out there that might be struggling with bereavement.
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