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It is Friday afternoon in Fort Bragg, the day of my one-man show at Tim Carmody Arts. The musicians are setting up in the gallery. I am practicing breathing in a continuous breath, not stopping at the chance to rearrange the art installation for one last time. “A Sacred Artist in Modern Times” is being readied for performance in a different and new expression. It is time to be born again as a new and evolving self. I am working the dream of finding total acceptance of whatever life serves you, living life on life’s terms and making something out of every experience you are given. Every moment in life is a life worth living because everything has a reason for being in the flow of life.
After you have gathered and waited for a dream to be birthed, it is like waiting for a newborn to show itself and break through the appropriate walls to climb through to make it happen after its long and tedious journey to come into existence in this world. This is a beginning of an end to a lifetime, a breathing of another person into being.
There has to be a beginning of an experience in order to come to an end. But, we are only at the beginning of the transformation to become what will be, in this state of becoming.
The intention is to be present for the unfolding of the show. The outcome had a forecast which was two-fold. First, it was a display of visual arts and the musicians playing, the people come and going, viewing the art and being lost in conversations. Secondly, it was an opportunity to explore the story and the relationships developed within the unveiling to the traveling art show called “A Sacred Artist in Modern Times.”
Soul conversations. Heart conversations. Conversations, cries of being thought of as being something to be honored, thought of as something being sacred.
The conversations, the exchanging of the ideas and the individual journeys of perceptions which allowed a universal story to be birthed within the audience and allowed the evening to be grounding and transformational one. This was a response to the call for a conversation, a calling for the transformation of the human spirit. It was a sharing of healing moments, a sharing of stories, soul to soul.
I went to bed to allow dreams to take me to a place of restful sleep and the releasing of my personal will.
The next morning I arose slowly, my spirit and body moving at a steady but slow pace. I took in the light of the morning of the day. I awakened to listen to Sadhguru while doing deep breathing exercises. I have to find my center so I could start my day. It is a good day to be above ground and counted. Showtime and game on.
Last night I was having a people-in-conversation-in-deep-soul-language kind of evening and I needed to reboot my mind, body, and spirit. I had to inhale the meat of the evening past, the magic of the festival of the spirit, the heart and the mind. We were connecting and I was present to be accountable.
I am summoned downstairs to talk to an artist/actor/writer who is in transition and had heard about my show and the opening. I go downstairs to meet him. As I reach out to take his hand, I remember him from the last time I was in Fort Bragg two years ago.
“…dance as if you have a full theater
seats filled and the musicians are playing your music
and the singers are singing your songs…
and new echoes of creation in this room full of memories
and upcoming dreams are yours
As they pass through your heart to your mind…”
From Fire by TWA
He is an artist, a writer, and actor who decided to finally give himself permission to be his authentic self, whoever that might be. He needs a compassionate ear, a person who could process and respond in a wise manner of being. He needed to hear another artist and a physical echo of who he really is, without feeling judgment or shaming. He needed to hear my story of finding the respect for the sacredness of my thoughts, actions, and deeds. His thoughts seem to always precede his speech. He is fragile and brilliant in his thinking. He is looking for approval of his breath being given to him as a human being.
He at one time was a corporate man but is now in his retirement. He is attempting to be an artist/writer in the process, in search of a mentor who would validate his reasoning for being an artist in the midst of becoming himself, fully. I validate his questions by being myself. My show has given him permission to be himself. Our conversations were echoes of embracing personal transformation, conversations about being present to receive the gifting of living in the serenity of grace. Our connecting was healing for both of us, man to man.
As the day moves on a young female local comes in to see the show. She wanted something fresh and wanted a chance to see another vision of an artist. She is of Native American descent and tells me tales of feeling isolation being born and raised in the area. I tell her of my sense of isolation being raised as “one of the only ones” in my everyday life. That sensibility allowed me to develop a deeper sense of self, to be comfortable with myself anywhere and at any time. As I talked about my experiences, her smile grew wider in agreement. She told me she enjoyed my stories of women, men, and language. I told her with pride, thank you.
I am listening to KNYO 107.7, situated next to the Tip Top Lounge, playing music loudly as love words flowed, being screamed out into the street on an early Saturday evening in downtown Fort Bragg. The people moved in the waves of sound, rocking their bodies to the beats. Some just stood still as others without thinking slowly moved their hands and heads. My mind danced in their stories as my heart sang their songs they could not sing. It was show time with curtain calls and all, time to dance as if I have a full theater.
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Photo Credit: Getty Images