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We’ve all had that fantasy where we get to relive some pivotal moment in our past and change the outcome. That time we didn’t speak to the girl, or score the game winning point, or we just froze up and kept our mouth shut when we should have spoken out. However, if I could go back, I wouldn’t change a thing, but I would tell my younger self a few things to help him out down the road.
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“So, you’re me, huh?” I said. “I’m glad my fashion sense gets better.”
“Huh?” said the younger version of me. “Who the heck are you?”
“Doesn’t matter,” I said. “Shut up and listen. I’m gonna give you some life advice…”
1. Never forget who you really are inside.
Outside forces will be like a blitzkrieg, attacking your personality and your core beliefs. If you let it change you, one day you will look into a mirror and not recognize the man staring back. That is a cage that’s almost impossible to escape.”
2. Never settle
I would ask that he evaluate his relationships and determine the ones that have actual worth and meaning. This is to save him from years and years of internal torment, thinking he’s unlovable and worthless. I would make sure he knew of his self-worth.”
3. Follow your heart, instead of what society tells you to do
I would tell him that he is a warrior, a poet, and a good soul. I would tell him not to waste time on anything he doesn’t have passion for, because when you look back from the standpoint of age and wisdom, life is precious and you shouldn’t waste a minute of it.”
4. Stop being afraid.
Make the first move, jump out of planes, BASE jump from a bridge, travel the world, learn how to eat on a dollar a day, but above all, fuck fear. Learn to let go and fly, brother.”
5. Follow your instincts.
You’re a pretty good judge of character and you’re not easily fooled. Trust yourself in all things and you’ll avoid a lot crap.”
6. Never compromise your ethics to get something you want.
Doing so will not fulfill any desire you have. It’s an empty hollow feeling when you betray your own trust.”
7. Love like there is no tomorrow because the future isn’t set.
You will feel pain and people will hurt you, but love is the magic that makes life worth living. Love freely, unconditionally. Accept those you love for who and what they are. Never, ever, ever stop loving, no matter how much it hurts sometimes.”
I gave him a wink and then I disappeared.
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It’s nice to think about stepping back in time, doing something different to experience the outcome. Just remember, that the past is the past and it should stay there. Changing anything would have fundamentally changed who you are right now.
If you don’t like who you are, then now is the time to change. Now is the time to move because if you stop, you die.
Even my younger self knew that to be true.
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Photo: GettyImages
It’s all rigged, built on stacked lies and charades. None of what you do matters – learn the guitar – travel and re-read Walden.
Of course, it’s all rigged. The lies and charades are the best part of the game. What you do DOES matter, though. I’ve never had an affinity for making music. I’ve been around the world several times. Walden is pretentious in my opinion. Thanks for commenting!
Great advice! Especially, never compromise yourself.
If you compromise yourself, you give up on yourself in my opinion. If you don’t believe in yourself, why should anyone else? Thanks for the comment!
Although all 7 points touched upon the truth of what it means to live the good life, point #1–Never forget who you really are inside–is the heart of the matter. The ego is the psychological imprint of the helplessness of infancy. It is rooted in fear and it is fear that forces us to conform to social norms. To be yourself in the face of such intense pressure is difficult indeed. As this author correctly points out, it “is a cage that’s almost impossible to escape.” Almost. But it is possible and that’s what you might call the good fight:… Read more »
Thanks for the comment, Kurt. I couldn’t agree more with you. I know what that cage feels like because I had to drag myself out of it. I had to get back to being me. It was one of the toughest transitions I’ve ever made in life, but so worth it.