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We are all the heroes of our own journey and our clothing can have a huge impact.
Modern life is a struggle. For those of us in employment, there is a constant fear of redundancy, as markets are disrupted by new technology and consumer behaviour changes.
Entrepreneurs face their own challenges, externally as they try to identify and connect to their market, but also internally with self-limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome. It can be tempting to quit.
It is not just professionally that we can be challenged, but also personally.
I separated from my wife recently. I have a new apartment and live alone, and I miss my two-year-old daughter. I see her three times a week, but I miss her.
I got postnatal depression when she was born, and it took a lot of effort to get it under control. Counselling, antidepressants, meditation, mindfulness, becoming a Neuro-Linguistic Programming Practitioner, and more. In the end, my wife and I separated, very amicably.
I live in Cumbria, in the North of England. My family and brothers are on the south coast, where I grew up.
It has been a tough few years, but I know from watching movies that the hero has to undergo a physical transformation. They need to armour up or simply have a shave, in order to start the next chapter of the quest. We can use physical anchors, such as clothing and jewelry to help us stay steady in a sea of uncertainty, and to ride out the storm when we are at our weakest.
My kid brother, Adam, is a Royal Marine. He understands this very well.
When he heard I was getting a divorce he sent this text.
“I’m gonna send some boots up with the parents when they visit. They should help you find your feet.”
He means he will send up his old deployment boots. No longer fit for military use, but still plenty of life for a civilian.
They arrived with this letter.
“Darren.
These two pairs of boots have successfully seen me through the most extreme conditions this planet has to offer!
From the arctic circle of Northern Norway in -45°C! To the arid desert of West America in +50°C heat!!
I have experienced every roller coaster humanly possible wearing these boots. From physical exhaustion, fear, suffering, anger, pride, and above all the happiest of joys!!
I know these boots will help and support you through this next chapter of your life. No matter what life throws at you, always remember these boots will help you walk tall.
I love you man.
Adam
X”
It helped. Of course, it helped. The letter itself was a gut punch of love and support. I can’t stumble, I can’t give up, I can’t flee. I wear my brothers boots. And my brother is amazing. I may be alone up here, but he provided me with an anchor of strength and belief in myself.
So I keep going. Not only that, but I had entered the entrepreneurial world, with all the obstacles and self limiting beliefs that are associated with it.
Many people follow Gary Vaynerchuk for his brash confidence and in-your-face style of motivational life coaching. Others are less impressed and think of him as a guru that is all retch and no vomit. What is he actually giving you?
He started selling trainers about a year ago, and last week I bought a pair.
They are designed around one of his sayings, “dirt and clouds”, meaning you don’t get to the dream if you don’t hustle in the dirt.
I needed an anchor to keep me going, to keep me in the fight as I grow my business. So I bought his trainers.
I am wearing them now and have written my first article for well over a month. Because Gary doesn’t mope, dwell, feel sorry for himself.
He pivots and moves forward.
And so will you.
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Previously published here and reprinted with the author’s permission.
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Photo provided by author.