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I have made many resolutions in my life. Some of them I followed through with and others were just grandiose wishes I knew deep down would never hold my attention long enough to accomplish. I’ve lost weight, read more, watched less television, stopped drinking sodas and even quit cursing one time. Unfortunately, none of these were permanent changes. Just simple exercises in doing a little better at some point in my life. The weight came back, I have a TV in every room, and I am currently downing a damn soda.
Knowing all that coupled with the wisdom of age, I don’t really plan on making any resolutions this year. At least none that can be quantified like the ones in the past. The truth is that every time I have made those resolutions the fall after the success makes me more of a self-loather than before. It ends up being an internal insulting contest where I say things to myself like “you moron, you could do better and you have!” or “You lost all that weight now look at you!”
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In all reality, resolutions are just pre-planned self-destruct mechanisms. Yes that’s a defeatist thing to say, and it’s tinged with bitterness and depression but hey that’s who I am. Sure some people are smart enough to make small resolutions. Things like, “I won’t kick any puppies this year.” or “I will not eat ketchup on my ice cream.” The things that are easy to avoid. I always go for the big stuff, the things that are real struggles for me on a daily basis. Then when I fail, I end up going all in toward the opposite end of the spectrum. Let’s just say, I am really good at eating and profanity is my first language.
So this coming year I am going to make the only resolution that makes sense for me. I am just going to try to do better than I did the day before. Yes, I know that is simplistic and an extremely worn out statement. That really is a goal we should all reach for every day. That is my point, we don’t. We wait until January 1st to make a huge change in our lives and for the most part, we fall face first into a pile of shit. Then sometime around the middle of May, we tell ourselves we will do better next year, and then the next seven months are a raging disaster.
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I don’t knock anyone for making resolutions, if that’s your thing and it is something you feel you can accomplish, then go for it. I just think we need to make those resolutions more than once a year. I find myself making them every day. When I fail as a father, a husband or as a human, I know that I need to do better the next day, not next year. Then when I fail the next day, I know the next chance to do better is the following morning, not the next ball drop.
I know that in the last 12 months I have hurt people. I know I have said things I can’t take back. I know I have made decisions that negatively impacted someone else’s day and lives. So in the coming year, my goal is to make less of those mistakes and be resolute not to have to make the same amends in 2018 that I do in 2017.
Here is to your resolutions for 2017 to be more about building something new than about repairing the damage of the past. Just strive to do better than yesterday.
Happy New Year!
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Photo: Getty Images
I’ve always believed that the 1st of January is simply another day. If you are committed to improving your life there is no real reason why you should have to wait to a set date to lay down your goals and turn them into action steps. When you are genuinely determined to make a change that is when yo make real, planned, targeted resolutions.