Scare Season

It’s now early October which means that summer is a thing of the past and Halloween season is fully upon us. Spooky decorations have been hung, different superhero costumes tried on to see if they still fit (me) and daily attempts made to try and startle dad into atrial fibrillation (her).

If that doesn’t really sound all that different than any other time of the year around here you’re correct but our weirdness seems a little less weird once it starts getting darker a bit earlier and the stores put out their candy displays. We’re both reading books about vampires right now but her last one was about werewolves and mine was about Nordic forest demons. Other than the two new Marvel movies and The Suicide Squad the last things I watched were the latest Saw and Purge flicks and A Quiet Place 2. I’m debating between Malignant and the Candyman remake for next weekend. I’m not sure what it says about us but we only have time for two genres here : superheroes and horror. Halloween isn’t a season, it’s a state of mind.

Obviously we must be pretty brave then, right? Not afraid of anything?

Not so much. Five years ago I wrote that “being afraid is partly a learned behavior, the cerebral cortex telling a person to stay away from a hot stove that’s previously been touched. It’s also physiological, a triangle of neurons on the amygdala firing in response to perceived threats to our well being. Bravery is the ability to ignore this reaction, but so is foolishness and recklessness. I need to be sure that she learns the difference. I’m confident in her intelligence, but wary of her pride.” The only real time her courage has failed was three years ago at Six Flags Fright Fest. I’m assuming that she will do a little better when we go back next week but I’m also planning to get there early enough that by the time the sun goes down we will have already had a full day. I think that once that first scary clown makes an appearance it will be time to go.

I already know when I’ll be ready. It will have nothing to do with chainsaw wielding maniacs or gore covered zombies. Much to my daughter’s annoyance I call it a day when the only rides we have left to conquer are the tall ones. It seems that the older I get the closer to the ground that I like to stay. I agreed to go on the Sky Screamer swings in New Jersey because they are only 242 feet high as opposed to the 400 foot one that is a definite no for me but I still didn’t like it. To be honest I was higher than I wanted to be on the gondola that brought us from one end of the park to the other.

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“Living our lives in fear” is a phrase that is thrown around a lot nowadays, usually accompanied by a sneer and nonsense about immune systems and survival rates. I stopped paying attention a while ago. I work at a hospital taking X-Rays and for the last 18 months that has meant X Raying the lungs of Covid patients. I’ve imaged those that recovered, those that did not, and those that survived but are dealing with long term respiratory issues. I’ve been doing this job for almost thirty years and yes, the things that I’ve seen since this all started have scared me.

The differences between brave and reckless, cautious and cowardly aren’t always clear and aren’t the same for everyone. There was a rock concert last night that I would have attended if it was at an open air amphitheater instead of inside that I’m still not sure I needed to skip. I’ll go to the movies but during the day when there are less people there. The weather is still warm enough that we can eat outside at the restaurants that we frequent.

My kid is a weird and creepy adrenaline junkie and she totally gets it from me. Six Flags never opened at all last year and we are both excited to see how the park is decorated and to get one more day of roller coasters in before they close for the season. It sucks that the scariest thing about the day will be the people in line around us.

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This post was previously published on thirstydaddy.com and is republished on Medium.

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