Love is beyond words.
It is not everyone who claims they love you does.
You may even be in a relationship with someone for years believing they love you, but in reality, they don’t. You’re the one genuinely in love with them. Yes, they are just in your life for other reasons, not because they genuinely love you.
It’s heartbreaking, time-wasting, and a waste of your effort and life opportunities. You will have your heart ripped apart when they eventually walk out of your life, and upon realizing that all the time and effort you invested in the relationship were in vain.
The pain of loving the wrong person can alter the course of your love life. Some people never recover from the loss.
You don’t want to experience it.
So look out for these seven signs — signs it is love:
1. Mutual attraction
True love isn’t a solo verse.
If true love were a song, it would be a chorus, not a solo.
Here’s what that means:
You were attracted to him as much as he was to you; you both wanted each other in your lives. That you were not the only one doing the calling, checking up on them at work, visiting, and helping with the work or house chores.
Why? Because true love is weighty. It takes more than “I love you” to carry its weight. Sweet words are great. But they are not enough when it comes to keeping the love in a relationship alive. It is a burden to be left to one person. Bear it alone and you’ll get exhausted and break down.
A moment of truth:
Is your romantic partner as interested in you as much as you are in them? Do they call to check on you as much as you call to check on them; do they contribute to your personal and career success as much as you are to theirs?
If the answer is yes, then you can be sure it is true love.
2. You don’t force them to do things
They know what to do and do them without your pressuring them to. This is because if someone truly loves you they’ll have an above-average interest in your well-being. For that reason, they see things that need fixing that nobody else sees and go ahead to fix them. The same is your mood. If you’re not happy, they notice it. Instead of trying to avoid you, they draw you closer and encourage you to talk about it — to release the negative energy so you can be free.
3. They stick their neck out for you
There is a difference between reality and romantic movies. The difference is that there is no such thing as living happily ever after. Life is a mix of good and bad times. Life will bring trials your way in the same measure that she will bring peace. You will face challenges from friends and the family of your romantic partner. Even with your neighbors and coworkers, you will have conflict.
In those moments, a genuine lover will stand by you. They will team up with you and defend you; build your morale, cheer you up, and supply you with the necessary support you need to come out stronger and better. And you will.
Words are cheap, true love is action.
If someone loves you, they will stand with you in times of trial. They rise up to your defense when the people in his life challenge you without a fault. Why? because a genuine lover is a defender. They defend the ones they love. It is a huge sign of true love, if they stick their neck out for you, no matter what it’ll cost them.
4. They are patient with you
Most people are naturally impatient. Especially now, most of us can’t stand the wait and allow things to have their natural course. We want it now if not we leave for somewhere or someone else where we can get it.
It happened to me.
There was a colleague of mine to whom I was hugely attracted. I liked her. Later we started talking.
I asked her out. She declined. The following week, I sent her number to a friend who saw her picture on my status and desired to have her.
“What?! How can you be so impatient? You asked me out once and the following week you’ve already sent my number to someone else? You never truly love me. You were only trying to play with my emotions. To hell with you and your friend!”
She was right. Had I genuinely loved her, I would have been patient with her. I wasn’t patient because what I felt for her wasn’t true love.
It is the same during dating. You may not know this, but the truth is, you are quite more complex than you think; your likes and dislikes, your mood swings, your attitude around certain persons, why you react to certain situations the way you do… a lot.
It would take a lifetime for someone else to understand and fully adjust to living happily with you. It is hard work that requires a lot of patience. And it takes someone who genuinely loves you to undertake the task. If he shows that level of patience, it is a sign he truly loves you.
If your love interest clicks this list of virtues, hold them close; open your heart to them; and invest your loyalty and commitment. Why? Because they will make your relationship dreams and fantasies come true.
To your success in relationships,
Cheers!
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Alexander Grey on Unsplash
