Is anything lost when a prominent gay man becomes a symbol of hetero-masculinity?
Neil Patrick Harris. If you are a white male between the ages of 18 and 27, you probably just conjured up a whole load of ideas: one-night-stands, “suiting up,” impeccable male fashion, internet memes, unicorns, and just maybe adolescent medical practice.
The internet era seems to have a habit of creating semi-ironic ultra-manly figures out of the detritus floating through pop culture, and NPH, as he is affectionately known, is among the newest and most masculine examples. Chuck Norris, Don Draper, Neil Degrasse Tyson, Charlie Sheen, et cetera.
Harris’ aura of mythical manliness has primarily grown out of his character on CBS’s otherwise bland “How I Met Your Mother”, the ultra-hetero Barney Stinson. Combined with his offbeat cameos in the “Harold and Kumar” movies, Harris has constructed and inherited an image of outsized masculinity, complete with hedonistic womanizing, macho-man confidence, and a good helping of wacky millennial mysticism. Yet the really bizarre thing about NPH’s persona is it’s coexistence with his thoroughly public sexual orientation.
Of course, this persona was already well under construction when Harris came out as gay in 2011. That its evolution continued with only minor retrofitting is either a wonderful comment on the inclusivity of the mythos of modern masculinity, a weird indication of the non-essentialism of sexual orientation in perceived identity, or an odd combination of the two.
Some of these cultural retrofittings have raised, among those who think seriously about this sort of thing, some really interesting questions about how we perceive gay men. Take for example a recently popular caption in NPH internet memes: “Neil Patrick Harris only became gay when he ran out of women.” That statement can occupy multiple points on the spectrum between treating sexual orientation as a casual non-issue, and treating it as phase, something that is not inherent or meaningful to a person’s identity. As a straight man, I’m in no position to claim that Harris is obligated to be a beacon of the gay community, but I don’t think that this is his choice anymore.
There is little doubt that the mythos of NPH as we know it primarily appeals to college-age straight men who like “The Hangover” movies, “Family Guy”, and pounding Jaeger before checking out some honeys. In this sense, Harris’s invented persona can almost be viewed as a type of reverse minstrel: instead of portraying his own identity in an absurd, outsized manner, it portrays the other identity in the same manner, for the purpose of their own amusement. But like minstrelsy, a gay man becoming a symbol of hetero-masculinity reflects only what the all-powerful audience desires to be portrayed, rather than what the subject himself may accurately reflect.
Photo: AP, Mark J. Terrill
The title of the piece is a bit problematic, but I get what it’s asking. I’ve been thinking about NPH’s role in mainstream pop culture recently. I saw a clip of him doing an interview on the Colbert Report in which Stephen jokes that NPH is such a threat because he makes gay seem unthreatening. Obviously, Colbert is doing his bit where he pretends to be a ultra conservative ass-hat…but phrasing it that way got me thinking. I think NPH is kind of a lot like a gay Louis Armstrong. Armstrong got a lot of flak for pushing his upbeat,… Read more »
Interestingly, he’s been a heck of a lot less heteronormative in his Broadway roles. He was the MC in Cabaret, and he’s just now bringing Hedwig and the Angry Inch to the stage…though I don’t know if he’s going to be Hedwig or not.
I think everyone is focusing way too much on his personal life, and not enough on what Dan is actually talking about—the roles he chooses to play, the one role specifically that has given him the most social currency and essentially reestablished him as a household name—Barney Stinson. As Erin outlined above, its not exactly the best example of enlightened masculinity available for American youth on primetime television. Does NPH have a responsibility, as one of the few gay figureheads on current primetime television, to portray a better kind of man, even a better kind of heterosexual man? Is he… Read more »
“Does NPH have a responsibility, as one of the few gay figureheads on current primetime television, to portray a better kind of man, even a better kind of heterosexual man?”
Does this mean in your mind NPH should be restricted to roles where he only plays your idea of “a better kind of man”? He’s an actor portraying a role. There are a lot of men out there like Barney Stinson, and they existed before Barney did on screen. Do you put this burden on straight actors, or minority actors to only portray a certain type of person?
And here I was thinking being in a committed relationship with another man was “gay enough” (seriously?). Silly me.
I think the author of the article is conflating NPH as a person, NPH’s roles as an actor (especial Barney in How I Met Your Mother and his Harold and Kumar portrayal of himself), and way that the author thinks NPH is perceived by some demographic. I imagine that the author of the article is consciously choosing to use the ridiculous rhetorical construction “Is this person [adjective used to describe a minority community] enough?” in order to stir controversy, or get website hits, or whatever else. If not, then I could angrily rant about why it is that such a… Read more »
I was a fan of How I Met Your Mother the first season. But as the show as gone on, it’s become increasingly misognistic. Even the women in it have been written to be misognistic. I seriously think a bunch of 12 year olds write that show. I remember an epidsode where Barney dreamed up girls that had boobs on their backs. I also remember a lot of ” dumb slut” talk. I don’t know how tihs show is still on the air. And I often wonder how NPH contends with the stereotypes that often get made about gay men… Read more »
Well, as a little thing I posted a few days ago points out, gay men aren’t always anti-misogyny. https://goodmenproject.com/good-feed-blog/gay-male-sexism-and-how-it-happens/
Which isn’t to imply that NPH is necessarily sexist…I don’t get that vibe from him at all…just that maybe he isn’t too fussed by it, especially since he’s just an actor on the show and not really able to influence the show a whole lot. Or at least, not really.
I thought that part of the humor of the hyper-hetero NPH was the fact that he was actually gay. A fact that was probably suspected by most of his audience long before 2011. Now I’m to understand that it is more of an indictment. OK…note to self…do not enjoy NPH anymore…bad NPH…
What if I secretly still enjoy NPH? Does that make me a closeted gay lover?
I know I’m once again offending sensibilities here on the GMP, but my gay relatives will enjoy it.
Not to mention that apparently if you like his ladies’ man persona you are apparently a knuckle dragging college frat “bro” who enjoys entertainment like “The Hangover movies” and Family Guy. It’s all just so low brow and offensive to refined sensibilities!
It’s the varying degree of court jester antics that makes these characters funny. That doesn’t mean we want to emulate them. You’d think the MRAs would be in an uproar about the dumbing down of men again in these characters and situations. Why not. Let’s get everyone upset. It’s called inclusion.
He’s an actor. It’s what they do. Ask yourself this question: do you feel the same sense of injustice when a straight actor portrays a gay one on TV or the movies? If the feeling is different you may want to address that conflict in your own reasoning.
“…among the newest and most masculine examples.”
There’s no linear “most masculine” to “least masculine”… there are as many different (and equally valid) masculinities as there are men. Pee-Wee Herman’s masculinity is just as good as NPH’s is just as good as yours is just as good as mine. None of them are “more masculine” than the others.
This is as ridiculous a question as asking if people are “black enough” or “Latino enough”? Where did you determine this standard of gayness that NPH isn’t fitting into for you? Can I mention the snobbery you exhibit in this line: “There is little doubt that the mythos of NPH as we know it primarily appeals to college-age straight men who like “The Hangover” movies, “Family Guy”, and pounding Jaeger before checking out some honeys.” When you get into the real world and leave grad school, you’ll find that not everyone in the world is a walking stereotype. I know… Read more »
Was Raymond Burr disabled enough?
Great story, but I wanted to point out that How I Met Your Mother is on CBS, not ABC.