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When I learned of R. Kelly’s marriage to late R & B singer Aaliyah in 1994 I was one of many who naively dismissed his transgression as some legal loophole that he exercised to have sex with an underaged 15-year old girl. At the time he was 27 years old. When the marriage was eventually annulled I, like many of his fans, dismissed it and continued to enjoy his artistic talent until 2002 when it was revealed that he allegedly recorded a video performing a sex act with another underaged girl. Since the video was reportedly blurred and he attested his innocence through his publicists I gave him the benefit of the doubt and dutifully rebuked the media accounts that were targeted at a multi-talented Black male artist, even after he was arrested and charged. When Kellz (his nickname) appeared on BET with his pastor to address the previous pending statutory rape charges, although he denied wrongdoing his demeanor and body language was unconvincing to me, especially when he mysteriously confided “I got a problem”. To sum up that conversation Kelly’s pastor quoted that there’s always room for forgiveness which instinctually led me to question what he needed “forgiveness” for. But that was my opinion.
From that point forward I began my own internal campaign to mute R. Kelly by refusing to listen to his music or watch his videos and even shelfing his latest CD from that era, years before the hashtag was invented and well after he was acquitted of the charges. Honestly, when he belted out his greatest love ballads I often questioned what grade the ‘lady’ was in, especially when his lyrics were the most explicit. Referencing his doubtworthy responses to the damning allegations I shared them with other people that I knew and out of respect for young Black girls that have been exploited, I encouraged others to think about this too. Per media interviews and personal interactions most in the Black community reasoned, “If he just admits it, we will forgive him”. To my surprise, my staunchest opponents were Black women, even those who would later watch Dateline’s “To Catch A Predator” and condemn the suspects. Many reasoned first and foremost that there was no concrete evidence of the crimes against him. Secondly, even though the alleged victim was a minor if she consented to it, what is the big deal? Another woman stated, “We need our Black male role models”. One female coworker said that the allegations weren’t important to her because when she heard “Step in the Name of Love” it just took her into a nostalgic trance. When I was in men’s Bible study I shared my feelings about the topic and the adverse affects of misogynistic Hip-Hop and R & B on young girls. With the exception of one, most of them who actually fathered daughters craftily shifted the narrative and commended the global affect that the genre has had. In summary, akin to Kellz’ pastor the conductor of our session surmised that because we’re spiritual we “don’t judge”.
Speaking of ‘judgment’, a close female relative who is well aware of my apprehension toward the balladeer, is a loyal fan like many women in her circle. Through here I have acquired a greater tolerance of his presence, so I finally set mine aside and attended one of his concerts with her. Undeniably, his talent is still a force to be reckoned with but sadly, he still seemed to me desperate for the attention that women bum-rushed the stage for in his prime years not realizing that his fans are now in a new stage in their lives. As rich as his legacy is I still had trouble dancing to the music, because I opine that history still proves he is still unwilling to face what he did.
In 2010 and 2016 respectively, world renowned Bishop Eddie Long and hip-hop godfather Afrika Bambaataa were both accused of pederastic allegations. Like Kelly, both men denied wrongdoing. Despite settling a $25M lawsuit with male accusers, the late Bishop Long declared that he was a “broken man” but never publicly admitted wrongdoing. Following child molestation allegations which were spearheaded by former associate now New York politician, Ronald Savage, Bambaataa made one public interview on a local Fox news station with his lawyer denying the allegations, which were corroborated by several other proclaimed male survivors. Swiftly changing the subject, he suggested that his fans focus on his contributions to hip-hop and anti-violence instead of demonizing his name.
With both interviews appearing to be a brush-off attempt by both men, even in the absence of hard evidence the Black community instantly denounced them with Bambaataa being forced to step down from the Zulu Nation which he founded. However, in the case of R. Kelly and the recent Bill Cosby drugging rape scandal of which he was recently convicted, the Black community was still reluctant to yield to the red flags even when the Coz refused to answer any questions about the claims. Hence, based on viral posts and tweets the public persecutions of Bambaataa and Long were primarily motivated by Black homophobia than the actual crime of pedophilia. Unlike tax evasion, athletic doping, or any other offense that would be condemned but otherwise forgivable by the public the last place for a defendant’s ambiguity is in a sexual assault claim, especially if he or she is innocent.
Naming two of the multiple unarmed Blacks (predominantly male) who have died at the hands of law enforcement and non-Blacks, there were no surveillance cameras to officially confirm the guilt of George Zimmerman when he fatally shot Trayvon Martin or to see if Amadou Diallo really did pose a threat to NYPD officers when he held up his wallet that they mistook for a gun. Even in the absence of the smoking gun that resulted in their untimely demise or any compelling evidence, we blindly took to the streets demanding justice based on the facts that the authorities eventually settled multi-million-dollar lawsuits for, when they did not have the courage to fairly prosecute the offenders. If our wise discernment can be respected in the above scenario mainly involving White offenders, we are remiss in our duty to take the same stand for offenders within our own community, especially those who stand on a high platform as the Kellz. If a grade school janitor is accused of having a sexual relationship with a middle school girl and he refuses to comment on the manner, would we dismiss it and go on with life as usual or demand answers and accountability, even by removing our own children from the school in question if necessary? Knowing the answer to the latter, when we defeat the giants it sends a profound message to the elves.
Recently, more women have come forth with accusations against Kelly and his initial video. He reportedly settled several civil suits for past inappropriate conduct. This prompted intervention from Black female celebrities such as Ava DuVernay, Jurnee Smollett-Bell, Shonda Rhimes, Viola Davis, a few male celebs and others affiliated with the #TIMESUP movement. A Dallas, Texas woman is filing a lawsuit against him claiming that he gave her a sexually transmitted disease and was grooming her to be in a sex cult. The parents of another woman are making the same claim of cult initiation, but the alleged adult victim denies the claims. For those of us who do not remember, the female who was set to testify against him in the 2002 scandal eventually retracted her testimony. Though no one knows the reason, it is questionable who or why she changed her mind and if she actually felt safe to testify. Recognizing Kelly’s past and possibly those in his entourage, especially young girls from the inner city will dread the ‘no-snitching’ policy that imposes an unhealthy fear on their lives for even considering legal justice, if in fact he is guilty of those sexual offenses.
Matthew 7:1-4 NIV commands “Do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others you will be judged. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye when you pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?” With all mankind subject to the optic laser, boulders will descend at the rate of infinity. Since we have all sinned, people often use that scripture to offset their own guilt about any offense they have committed or even nullify the sins of others. No doubt, the elementary school boy who grabbed a girl’s buttocks and ran has committed a sexual offense. However, since the boy was a child he acted like a child. Compared to a 50-something balladeer the maturity level of the scholar will be given more considerable leniency than that of a seasoned adult with a broader knowledge of life and rules. That said, we bring spiritual damnation to victims by silencing them with scripture instead of using it to heal their pain.
Unfortunately, because brothers played the race card and sistahs consumed by their orgasmic fantasies blamed the survivors for voluntarily engaging in sex with the Kellz, allegedly, delayed justice left future victims vulnerable to predatory acts committed by him and other sex offenders. Instead of ostracizing influential women who have come forth in their defense I, especially but not exclusively, challenge men who earnestly believe in his guilt to come forth in their support. I am not suggesting that we convict the balladeer without evidence, but in the name of clarity and justice I sincerely implore those with equal discernment to openly declare your support of the hashtag #MUTERKELLY to enable us to hear the voices of those women declared voiceless. Only in his silence can we effectively comprehend the source of their pain so the authorities can assert fair judgment. We can step in the name of love when it’s time to dance. Right now, it’s time to stand.
#MuteRKelly
