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Do you want a sexual encounter to remove the memory of the ex, and the hundreds, perhaps thousands, of times that you were intimate with her?
Because apparently, that is all it takes to move on. Sex.
The reasoning has some merit. It is not helpful to masturbate about memories with a person you are no longer involved with. You are older now and you might have let things slide a little. A little grey hair perhaps? Receding a little? A little bit more padding around the stomach area?
You need that confidence boost and to know you are still sexually attractive.
You also don’t know how dating works anymore, and you are not sure if you can satisfy another woman the way you did when you were in a relationship. After all, you spent years working out what each other liked, and probably got the routine down to 15 minutes to work around children, chores, and life.
Smiley faces all around.
Until you are not together anymore.
Then what do you do?
Well, age will be a factor. If you are in your 40’s, women your own age will probably have children. Are you ready to be a step-dad?
Women in their 30s might want marriage, and to be a mother. Is that what you are looking for?
So then you get down to 20-year-olds. You are then “that” guy.
So on a long dark night of the soul, you google local escort services.
And Pandora’s box is opened.
A quick search shows several sites that can supply a wide variety of encounters, from women who could easily be models.
If you live in a city, they are quite possibly minutes away from where you live. In moments they would be in your bedroom.
In the UK the average rates tend to be £40 for 15 minutes, £70 for half an hour, and around £120 for an hour. Overnights can be around £600, but up to well over a £1000.
Incall seems most popular with the escorts, meaning you go to them, and it’s a little cheaper. If they come to you prepare to pay a little more.
They appear to do everything. From GFE (girlfriend experience) to (PSE, porn star experience).
But this is not really a girlfriend is it?
It is a paid for service. A fantasy. Any age (above 18), any ethnicity.
When you were younger you may have had the sexual bucket list. Well, you can do that in a weekend now. Japanese women? No problem. Threesome with two 20-year-olds? Consider it done.
Any sexual appetite you want satisfied is a text or phone call away.
But that will not make the divorce go away.
Will a sexual encounter with a 19-year-old Romanian girl make you feel better? Feel healed? Feel more like a man?
And what has happened in this girl’s life to lead her down that path?
Sure the internal battle will rage. They are being paid, they say they enjoy it, it is not exploitation, you are both getting what you want.
But are you getting what you want?
If you are not willing to tell your ex-wife about it, or perhaps your children when they grow up, chances are it is a mistake.
You are in pain right now. But is this the path you want to choose? You are better than this.
But the temptation is right there. Every night. In every form imaginable.
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Photo by Dani Vivanco on Unsplash