At the ripe age of t30 (and some change,) it stifles me to see many peers exhausted and unimpressed with the process of life. Similar to an age old nearly retired person, they view our world as a pit of lost dreams and hopelessness. That’s remarkably untrue.
1.) Questions in the Que
At no point in life should you question where you are versus where you could be. Unless conflicted with life-threatening circumstances, chances are this moment of yours surfaces because of you.
Simply said, your life is a culmination of the choices you made whether good or bad. Don’t dislike them—fix them. Complaining doesn’t help anything and questioning confirms you were afraid to listen to your heart. Let this moment be a lesson that time is constant and unlike so many things cannot be replaced. Use it wisely for once it’s gone you will never get it back.
2.) Comfort Replaces Happiness
Uncertain times can cause a ruckus in any household. You don’t know what the future holds so stay true to yourself and cast on that ever-so-comfortable safety net. What people fail to realize is that net is a staple for our protection, not happiness. By confusing the two you fall short of something your life depends on.
Instead, opt for things that bring you real joy. Many days that will require you to leave your comfort zone and to do things you haven’t done before in order to acquire feelings you never had.
3.) Life Loses its Zest
Reading an article in GQ Magazine, I applauded actress Sarah Paulson who supported a life that goes in stride. Taking both the failures and triumphs, using them to your advantage until your moment comes to shine, it was a message I thought many people should hear, so I immediately shared it with my friends.
Sarah reminds us that life is not linear, nor is the path to success, which so many people fail to see. We go to school, land a job, get married, buy a home, and start a family. All without tapping into our true selves without prioritizing progress, thus, leaving so much untapped potential to waste.
No one should live a life of mundane redundancy just because they decided to play it by the book. Keep going, keep growing, and keep learn new ways to make things better and keep the spark alive.
4.) Fear Takes Flight
When staring death in the face you find no shortage of pessimists choosing fear over flight. Oftentimes, it can be something as menial as a financial shortfall, maybe a lack of resources, or admittedly not having the drive or determination. My favorite line of all is “It’s just the way it is.” A subtle way of accepting what is for lack of faith, this line kills all that is meant to be.
A healthy option has and always will be minimizing the time spent with anyone who thrives on negative speak. It’s contagious, time-consuming, and an insult to all that you are worth and meant to be in the short days we have on this earth.
5.) Your Past Becomes the Future
Have you ever met a former jock who only lives in the past? Once the popular kid in school, lauded for his good looks, athletic ability, and 15 years later can’t move past his glory days. Beginning conversations with “What if” and “If only”, proves moving on is difficult and is clearly holding him back.
For better or worse, our past is just that and should be used as a learning opportunity to recreate and develop ourselves for the future. Accept it for what it was, but never let it define you.
In the end, everyone owes it to themselves, not their friends, spouses, or family to pursue whatever it is that they are willing to be. The moment you live by someone else’s design or choose to do what’s accepted, it devalues your uniqueness that no one else could ever compete with. Pretty unsettling if you ask me.
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Photo credit: Getty Images
I love it! “Choosing to live by someone else’s design devalues your uniqueness.” So true, and so tragic. Super thoughts on not settling!
Thanks so much for the comment, Pearlc! We only get one shot at this thing called life, so I figure why not give it everything we’ve got!
And whatever you do, don’t make any promises, to anyone, ever. It is those promises, and the acceptance of responsibilities that will kill you faster than anything. I will never be able to fix anything about my life without breaking those promises, and abandoning those responsibilities, and proving that I am not, after all, a man of my word. I didn’t just settle. I committed to things that turned out to not be at all what I wanted, after decades of failure at killing myself trying to get anything I actually wanted out of life. Things can change, and maybe… Read more »
Thanks so much for your comment, Anthony. While I am not aware of your situation, I honestly believe we can always find a way to pick up the pieces and get back on track. Hopefully you find some resolve and a way to keep moving forward and building on a new life that reflects your great potential and value in this world.