The inspiration faerie shows up in my dreams, in the shower, in the car, when I am doing therapy sessions with clients, when I am listening to podcasts or TEDtalks, when I am reading books, articles or Facebook posts. These were thoughts that came to when I was sweating it out at the gym.
What if most, if not all the problems in the world could be solved with these simple ideas? I encourage you to endeavor to follow them. We are works in progress and will sometimes drop the ball.
Rule #1
If it’s not yours, don’t touch it. If you want to touch whether it is an object or living being, ask first. If the answer is yes, move forward. If the answer is no, go back to rule #1. If the answer changes from yes to no, go back to rule# 1. Being in a relationship with someone does not give anyone ownership over their partner’s body. Consent is a crucial aspect of healthy and safe relationships.
Rule #2
No matter how angry or entitled you feel, you have no right to initiate violence toward another. Fighting back is for self defense only, to get away to safety, not to beat the crap out of someone. If you are a survivor of assault or abuse it doesn’t give you the right to assault or abuse another. The same is true for verbal violence. Sometimes our filters aren’t working and damaging words escape past them. Remember that childhood chant, “Sticks and stones may break my bones (who the heck thought THAT one up?), but names will never hurt me.”? The truth is, words hurt. They damage the psyche and break trust.
Rule #3
The Earth is not your garbage can or ashtray. Please don’t toss your litter out your car window or drop cigarette butts on the ground. Remember that we are caretakers of this planet and want it to be a safe and healthy place for the next generations. As my friend Richard McLaughlin (a.k.a. Eco-Man) sings, Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.
Rule #4
Children are not property. They have the right to safety and love and body sovereignty. Hitting teaches them fear and not respect and models behavior that most adults wouldn’t want them to exhibit out in the world. Even hugs should be by consent.
Rule #5
Love and respect yourself and it will be easier to love and respect the world. You may have come to believe that because of the life experiences you may have had and the abuse you may have endured, that you are not worthy of respect. Consider the innocent newborn that you once were. Is that little being any more worthy than you are now?
Rule #6
Be in integrity with yourself and everyone else. Do what you say, say what you mean, but don’t say it mean. Ask yourself if you want people in your life to trust you, is what you are about to do or say, going to engender trust or doubt? Do you want your relationships to be honest?
Rule #7
Sometimes life gets messy and out of control. One simple way to clean up after ourselves is to follow what I call the House Rules.
If you open it, close it.
If you take it out, put it back.
If you drop it, pick it up.
If you make a mess, clean it up.
If you break it, please repair or replace it.
Don’t expect anyone else to clean up your physical or emotional clutter.
-The Management
I had introduced my co-workers to the rules and one of the office managers had printed them out and placed them on the refrigerator door for the staff to see.
What if the most important rule to follow is to let love lead? WWLD? What would love do?
Perhaps Love would let someone else go first in line. Maybe it would offer understanding rather than judgment; forgiveness rather than condemnation. Naturally, it would want whatever is for the highest good for those whose paths it crossed. Love, if it really is all it is meant to be, wouldn’t just be offered to others. It would flow like a fountain, unceasingly from the Source within us. As I tell my clients, “You can’t fill someone else’s cup if yours is empty.”
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This post is republished on Medium.
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stock photo ID: 2044696910
