I first encountered the ebullient, effusive Dr. Leo Buscaglia who strutted across the stage during PBS fundraising time, when I was in college. I was fascinated with his passion for life, his storytelling ability and naturally, his reputation for offering heart to heart hugs. I wish I had the opportunity to meet him, and hug him in person, instead I wrote an article about him in 1988 for a magazine I co-published called Visions. Over the years, I immersed myself in most of his books and applauded his identity as Dr. Love who taught a class called Love 101 at USC. It was inspired by the suicide of a student who gave no indication that she was experiencing depression. The classes were always full, I imagine, because the students knew that love is as essential to learn about as academic subjects.
He earned a bachelor’s degree in English and speech (1950), a master’s degree in language and speech pathology (1954) and a Ph.D. in language and speech pathology (1963).
His stage presence was larger than life. He would sweat, sleeves rolled up as he encouraged us to be fully human, to prevent loneliness, to let other people in, to learn about the people in our lives. It was as if he was speaking to me as much as any other audience member.
A child of Italian immigrant parents, Leo treasured his heritage. He told tales of the loud, musical, embracing family he grew up in. One story that remains with me is that at the dinner table, his father would ask everyone what they learned that day. Nothing was too small and his father waxed enthusiastically about each tidbit of knowledge. That planted in Leo a love for learning.
He, like me, adamantly insisted that love is life affirming and life saving. “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”
He, like me, went out into the world, heart and arms wide open. Springboarding off of what I learned from him, hugs became my signature ways of communicating with people in my life. “Don’t spend your precious time asking “Why isn’t the world a better place?” It will only be time wasted. The question to ask is “How can I make it better?” To that there is an answer.” My answer is hugging heart to heart.
He, like me, believed in taking leaps of faith, especially when it was challenging. “The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love. Chained by his certitude, he is a slave; he has forfeited his freedom. Only the person who risks is truly free.”
He, like me, practiced mindfulness and full presence. “Live now. When you are eating, eat. When you are loving, love. when you are talking with someone, talk. When you are looking at a flower, look. Catch the beauty of the moment!”
I consider Leo an honorary Hugmobster Armed With Love.
In an interview, he told the journalist, ““I would like my tombstone to read: ‘Here lies Leo Buscaglia, who died living.’” Me too Leo, me too. When it’s my time, I want to feel as if I have loved and hugged my heart out.
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Image courtesy of the author.