Drive around and meet those that I consider my extended family. They are happy to meet me, someone who has so been close to the person they love. Do I resemble him, carry glimpses of who he is, bring stories to somehow bring him alive and remind them that he is not in some make-believe place, that he is still real? I see it in them. They are happy, but their loved one is not out. They hug me and give thanks, welcome me into their home and near me into the tight-knit relationships, but now I’m on the
other end looking in, and I understand how they feel.
We speak of my friend as if he were a figment of the past, recount stories and dig into his childhood like he roamed lifetimes ago. And so it seems. Around the table the coffee is sipped, bread is broken, almost like offerings for the spirits, but my brother is still here and not yet gone. He lives. He is pulled away in a place that I am learning to forget, the customs and thoughts, and I do this without wanting to. But I don’t forget him, them, my brothers who are still stuck in time.
And so it is, I have become one on the other end, where normal people don’t understand how it feels to love someone in prison.
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