I have been, like many, struggling with the reprise of an authoritarian presidential candidate with self aggrandizing narcissistic characteristics who seems to have a hypnotic hold on people from all walks of life, convinced that he stands for their values or could create the country in their image. I have prayed for understanding and acceptance. I have prayed for insight and wisdom. I have prayed for conscious, concrete ways to make a difference and steer people’s decisions in a pro-social way. I have (forgive me) even prayed for karma to come a calling for all of the destructive things he has done. I have allowed him to take up too much space in my head and heart and drain me of hope for a positive outcome for our country and by extension, the world. I consider myself a peacemaker, but I have a war going on inside and want harmony. It doesn’t mean having a neutral attitude where all opinions are held as equal.
“We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.” ~ Elie Wiesel
I just had a be-careful-what-you-ask-for conversation. I have been feeling so angry, frustrated and despairing over the state of the world and have wanted to speak with someone on the other side of the aisle to understand why they see the world the way they do. I was in a store, picking up some last minute Christmas gifts and a man about my age was speaking with someone on Bluetooth and commenting on the increased cost of the product we were both buying. His statement was that it was the fault of Liberal voters. Not being able to control my reaction, I shook my head and took a deep breath in. He said to the person, who turns out to be his 25 year old son, “I just made a woman cringe.” He told his son he needed to go and continue to speak with me. Thus began an in depth conversation that lasted at least 30 minutes. We were in our own little bubble since people were walking around us and no one stopped to listen. We made eye contact. There was no shouting or gesturing. There was no posturing.
I was wearing my BE KIND tie dye sweatshirt. I outed myself as Liberal, tree hugging hippie, social worker who marched for the ERA and No Nukes. This man is a local police officer and was a history major in college. We actually listened to each other. Interestingly, he thought about going to DC on January 6th, but says he changed his mind for his own reasons which he shared with me. He did say that he would have defended his fellow officers from assault. He said the reason he supports TFG is immigration and less government interference in people’s lives. I asked about women’s rights to body autonomy, since government interference is at the core of overturning Roe v. Wade. He shrugged but didn’t launch into a pro-birth speech. He said that TFG isn’t pro-life. Of course not. We agreed the he is just saying what his base wants to hear.
The man is pro-Israel, and anti-Hamas. I told him that it was a horrific situation and that as a Jewish woman, I don’t want anyone killed in my name. I struggle with war, no matter how it is justified by the combatants. Although he thinks the Holocaust and other historical incidents of genocide were atrocious, he made a comment that he warned would be ‘throwing a land mine’. He said that Angela Merkel did more damage to Germany than Hitler did in the Holocaust by allowing in Syrian refugees since they diluted the German culture. YIKES! Landmine of a huge magnitude. It resonates with the same words as TFG about ‘blood purity’. We live in a multi-cultural country and it is enhanced by immigrants. My paternal grandparents were refugees from Russia during the pogrom. He says that he too is an immigrant and that he has traveled extensively, including to Ireland which we have in common. I told him that I had been there in 2018 during the ‘Yes Vote’ for reproductive rights. When I told him that not only am I an American citizen, but a citizen of the world, he referenced tribalism. I had to admit that my tribe, regardless of where they came from are those who share my values.
He disagreed with BLM. He showed me videos he took during riots in Philly. He said he had served in majority Black neighborhoods and saw himself as one of the good cops. I asked him if there were times when he did acts of service and kindness over the years without stopping to think if the people were worthy of his time and compassion. He nodded.
I told him I am an interfaith minister and struggle with with a loving God who would allow terrible things to happen. He agreed and said that we need to get rid of the ”bad people.” I said that we need not kill those we label ‘bad’, but change their minds. He said he would have liked to have talked longer but had more tasks to check off his list. We hugged. He asked if we could take a picture with me to show his son who he hung up on to talk to. Sure. I wished him well and said I hope I had planted some seeds.
About 20 minutes later, as I was standing in a supermarket checkout line a few miles from our original meeting, who is standing next to me? Clearly, we were meant to meet in answer to my prayer. I imagine I will encounter him again. I really like the guy. I don’t like some of his beliefs. Would I like to magically turn a Tr*mp voter into a Dem voter? Yes. I believe in miracles.
A musical illustration of this conversation came from the imagination and heart of my friend, Debra (Deva) Troy. It is called What If Peace Broke Out? What if peace began one difficult conversation at a time with the intention to truly understand what is going on in the minds and hearts of others without raised voices, raised fists or raised weapons?
“What If Peace Broke Out!”
By Deva Troy
What if peace broke out
on the planet
What if peace broke out everywhere
What if fathers and mothers
And sisters and brothers
Got along and showed they care
What if peace broke out on the planet
What if peace broke out everywhere
What if all religions vowed to end divisions
And loving kindness filled the air
I know it’s not easy
To be the change
That we seek
Could be happening everywhere
These are conscious choices
To only raise our voices
When we stand together
In love and care
What if peace broke out
On the planet
What if peace broke out everywhere
What if politicians
Made the right decisions
To heal our earth, land, sea and air
What if peace broke out on the planet
What if peace broke out everywhere
What if all the nations
Remembering we are relations
Chose to listen, love and share!
I know it’s not easy to be the change that we see
Could be happening everywhere
These are conscious choices to only raise our voices
When we stand together in love and prayer
What if peace broke out on the planet
What if peace broke out
EVERYWHERE!
What if peace broke out
What if peace broke out
EVERYWHERE!
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This Post is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: Author
