10 Habits of Couples in Strong and Healthy Relationships

Love Languages

Gary Chapman created the notion that men and women have five love languages. The concept is that people have unique ways of feeling loved. The five love languages are: words of affirmation, receiving gifts, quality time, acts of service, and physical touch. It’s important to know what love language speaks to you, along with your partner’s, and they might be different. Telling each other what makes you feel loved and special helps both of you stay connected. Furthermore, make sure you are attending to your partner’s love language consistently.

Appreciation

Often, we forget to let other people in our lives know that we appreciate them. We think it, but we don’t remember to show it. This occurs in our romantic relationships as well. Show your special someone that you love him or her. This could be done by words, cards, flowers, acts of kindness, or more. Remember, a flower a day keeps the relationship fights at bay. Okay, maybe not every day, but you get the point.

Positive Vs. Negative

Sometimes we get caught up in the negative. We hate our jobs, are annoyed with our friends and our boyfriend or girlfriend is getting on our last nerve. Uh oh, have we been drinking too much of that half empty glass? It’s vital that we look at our partner’s positive qualities versus the negative. Nobody is perfect, and that includes our significant other. So instead of focusing on the bad in the other person, let’s make a conscious effort to look at the good.

Pick and Choose Your Battles

There are arguments to be had in every relationship. It’s crucial to bring issues to the forefront and work through the hard times together. However, I don’t think arguing over your girlfriend using your favorite coffee cup should be one of those. You don’t want to be the girl who cried “argument,” do you? Pick and chose your battles wisely, because people in happy and healthy relationships do.

Sex

Let’s talk about sex, baby. Let’s also talk about how important it is in cultivating a flourishing relationship. Sex is simple. The more you have it, the more you want it. The other side of that is true as well. The less you have it, the less you want it. And, unfortunately, the less you feel connected to your partner will follow. Keep your sex life alive and interesting. “Spicing it up” is not just meant for the kitchen.

No Comparisons

The grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Or even if it is, it might not be the kind of grass you would even like. We often compare our lives to others — what jobs people have, their homes, or their clothes. And with the help of social media, we tend to compare our relationships as well. But the happiest of couples don’t look to see what the grass looks like on the other side. They are happy with the view out their own front door.

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This article originally appeared on Bustle.

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