Build on pieces of happy every day. And before you know it, you’ll have a happy life and a happy wife.
The more I study people, the more I learn there are easy things you can do to avoid an unhappy marriage. Every time I learn one of those things, I am filled with glee and want to share.
I am especially excited to share with those hubbies who really *want* to do good and be good, but don’t know where to start.
I believe it all starts with a little happy. We build on little pieces of happy every day and before you know it, you’ve got a happy wife and a happy life.
We know things happen. Ups and downs. 401ks and soccer games. Mortgages, audits, deadlines, jobs, kids, dogs, leaky pipes and loud music at the worst possible moment.
We have been there. We get it. We just believe happy is possible and you can have some and we can share what we have learned from our own bowl of happy so you can make more.
I recently asked the wise women of the ModernMarried Facebook page to finish the phrase: I love it when the hubby…
Because happy comes in all shapes and sizes and I was thinking maybe some of their happy could spill over into yours and mine and we could all have more.
So without further ado, if you ever wondered, what happy husbands do to keep their marriages strong and their wives smiling here you go….
19 things any husband can do to make his wife happier….
- Let her sleep in, make breakfast, round up the kids on any random Sunday
- Hold her hand in public
- Surprise her with a full load of laundry (washed, folded and scented – yes, that little paper you put in the dryer makes us Gleam with Joy!)
- Make her laugh. (this works almost any time. Except during dinner with inlaws or bosses, where it would be a bad idea, but you knew that right?)
- Kiss her in the morning. (and at night, or just randomly in the supermarket. We like kisses!)
- Fix things. (fix anything and we think you could rule the world. Seriously, when The Hubs replaces a light bulb, I just want to kiss him)
- Text her. (in the middle of the work day. Just because.)
- Share your day with her – the exciting stuff and the mundane stuff. We love to hear your stories.
- Leave a love note. (anytime, anywhere. It can be on a post it. Total Swoonville)
- Wash her hair. (5 different wives mentioned this. Not my thing, but you could try it. Any variation on this might be good too such as “rub her feet, massage her back.”
- Random Hug. (Just like kisses. Very rarely is this a bad idea. Except if we just got our make-up professionally done and our hair sprayed. Then choose option 2 and just hold our hand.)
- Cook. (In my house making sandwiches counts as cooking. There is never a moment we don’t like cooking. Because we love eating. See?)
- Run a bath. Add Bubbles. (We might wonder who you are and what you did with our husband, but we will be smiling all night long)
- Help us through bad days – using any of the above and just some words of encouragement. We love it when you are our Champions. Our encouragers and supporters.
- Listen. Just listen.
- Bring home a random gift from the grocery story. (If you see it and you think, “Oh, my wife would like that.” It’s that one. Don’t overthink this. You can make a woman very happy with a Snickers and a Soap Opera Digest.)
- Don’t blame us when something goes wrong. (You probably don’t like it when we do it to you right? Declare your relationship a no-negativity zone and replace blame with a request for a new behavior or a different option. This one is really just good for everybody.)
- Thank her. For anything. (You know how you feel when she thanks you? Yup. Works every time.)
- Clean up. After supper, before the game, for the kids. Anything that involves the word “clean” and is followed by “so you don’t have to do it” will totally accumulate brownie bonus points of happy.
There you have it. The simple things that make us smile and make you look like heroes in our eyes. Notice how very few of these require money, or hours of planning or even tons of effort. A lot of these can be done in a few minutes in between the rest of life. Yet the feelings of closeness they inspire can last for days.
Yes, that’s your wife calling her best friend to tell her, “He cleaned! And rubbed my back! And bought me a Snickers!”
And every time she tells the story, she is happy all over again.
If you are a happy husband, please share some of your happy – what does your wife love that other husbands can learn from? Please share in the comments.
Photo Credit: Flickr/ seanmcgrath