It’s vital to follow this list of twenty things to discuss before marriage since getting married is a significant event. Discussing these issues can help you and your potential spouse understand each other’s goals for the future. From kids to money to who will be cleaning the dishes on Friday night, everything is covered in this list.
1. Children
It is normal to consider having kids while you plan your wedding. Even if your definition of “family” doesn’t entail bearing children, marriage signifies beginning a family. If you plan to have children, you should talk about how many you want, if you’ll adopt, and when you’ll start the process before you are married. Don’t enter into your marriage believing you can influence each other’s decisions. It’s not fair to expect a man to father children he doesn’t want or to deny him, children. n. If so, finding someone else would make you both happier.
2. Money
There is no getting around that, therefore talking about money is one topic to bring up before getting married. It’s critical that you and your partner both understand how to manage money. You must also decide whether to combine your bank accounts or keep them separate. You should also talk about how much money you will save each month and who will pay the bills.
3. Family
Have you already met his family? Do you like them? Decide how you will treat your family and where you will set limits right now. It’s foolish to get married and assume that neither his parents nor your parents won’t attempt to become involved at some time.
4. Goals
Does he understand your long-term objectives? Do you recognize his? He has to be aware of your job aspirations and whether you want to devote the next five years of your life to work to advance professionally or earn a specific salary. You should also be aware of how his plans to leave his work and pursue a career as a wedding singer would impact your life.
5. Where Are You Living?
What are your plans once you’re married? You may already be living together, which eliminates part of the need to talk before getting married, but you may still want to know how long you want to stay in your present residence or whether you need to start saving money to buy a house soon.
6. Holidays
Where does your potential spouse want to go on vacation? Even if it’s unlikely to happen right soon, fantasizing about amazing trips you two could have together is exciting.
7. Religion
Whether you like it or not, talking about religion before marriage is crucial. If you two have diverse religious backgrounds, there’s a good chance that the subject has come up more than once. Before getting married, decide how you will observe religious holidays and deal with any religious disagreements.
8. Past Relationships
Here is a thing to talk about before getting married that could make you feel a bit uneasy. Unfortunately, it must be completed. It’s preferable to make everything public before the big day rather than waiting until it occurs.
9. Secrets
Another thing to let go of is its secrets. Inform him if you believe an ex-boyfriend may have a nude photo of you floating around online or if there is a job you had held that you aren’t too proud of. Coming clean is always preferable to living in fear of it coming out. How embarrassing would it be for your spouse to learn that you used to dress up as a clown for young kids’ birthday celebrations at a gathering with all of his friends?
10. Faithfulness
You would think that taking a vow to love one another unconditionally would sum up each other ideas on faithfulness, but that isn’t always the case. Some people do believe that if you are in different area codes it’s okay to mess around. Before you walk down the aisle, make sure that you and your future spouse share the same commitment to faithfulness.
11. Values
Each person has a unique set of values. Even if most values are quite similar, you should still talk about what values are most important to both of you before getting married. After that, you may determine what values your family will adhere to.
12. Showing Love
We all receive love differently. Some people respond well to compliments or repeated assurances of your devotion. For some, love is an action. Learn what you can do for each other to demonstrate your love for one another.
13. Chores
Didn’t think it was appropriate to talk about duties before marriage? You want to talk about it, I can assure you. It’s important to be clear about your standards for maintaining a clean home. Decide who is in charge of what duties immediately so that everyone is aware of who is to blame when the garbage isn’t taken out or the toilet is dirty.
14. Budget
It is not sufficient to merely talk about your finances. Together, you must also develop a budget. All of your expenses should be included in your budget, along with a strategy for tackling any debt and savings for the future. The amount of money left over each month for personal expenses should be specified in a proper budget.
15. Quality Time
How you will spend quality time together is something else to talk about before getting married. Plan unique occasions for the two of you, such as date evenings.
16. Parenting
If you have decided to have children, you must also plan how you will raise them. There are several varieties of parenting. While some parents are stricter than others, others are more lenient. Before getting married, it’s crucial to understand that there is no such thing as right or wrong.
17. How to Fight
Are you able to fight fairly? Before getting married, talk about conflict resolution strategies. Find out what subjects are sensitive and should be avoided to argue fairly.
18. Forgiveness
After a disagreement, how will you forgive one another? Are you aware of the behaviors he finds intolerable or that can make it very difficult for him to forgive you completely? Find out information like this right away.
19. Trust
Do you have each other’s trust? Does he currently have any areas in which you are not trusted? How can you win back their confidence? Talk about any trust difficulties you may have before getting married.
20. Jealousy
Any relationship can suffer greatly from jealousy. Let him know if you’re a jealous person. Inform him of your jealousy triggers and how he can help you get through them by avoiding them.
There are a lot of things
to talk about before getting married, as you can see. Don’t let these subjects scare you away from marriage. Just make sure you and your potential partner are completely aware of one another.
What additional issues need to be addressed before getting married?
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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