There comes a time in every man’s life when he has to ‘face the music’
Some step into the light and some shy away…
The difference between these two:
And a boy.
When it comes to breaking the news that you’re going to be a Dad to your parents or significant adult role model here are some tips:
1. Do it face to face
This is really important..
This is a time to display your level of maturity and courage. Can you imagine what it would feel like to hear that kind of news from your son/daughter via a text?
Show them some respect and do it face to face.
Even if you are in different countries, there is no excuse not to even be looking at their face via Skype or something online. We live in a day and age where being connected is just a few clicks away, so use it.
2. Don’t dance around it
When it comes down to actually saying the words to your parents, don’t start talking vaguely about ‘how the future is going to change’ or ‘how great things must start small’.
I think I said something along the lines of “Mum, I’ve got something to tell you…. XX is pregnant”
Its like ripping a bandaid off…
I don’t think there is any way to tip toe or dance around this. You’ve just got to get it out there.
3. Eye contact
This will be tough, but it’s important.
When people connect it’s through our eyes.
Your parents don’t want to see you with your head hung in shame like a toddler who spilt their milk.
Its time to face up so..
Stand up, chin up and deliver.
4. If you are in a relationship with the Mum-to-be then consider being there when you tell her parents
This should be judged on a case-by-case basis.
You can really view this as an opportunity to show her parents how committed, loving and supportive you are for their daughter.
This will take a lot of courage but the rewards worth it and its a good trait to be in the habit of practicing.
If you’re not in a relationship and haven’t met her parents before maybe hold off on the first ever meeting being a “Hi, I’m Tim… and I knocked up your daughter” kind of vibe…
Might not go down so well.
However, in this situation, I would say to meet the parents very soon after she has broken the news.
Ultimately, no matter the situation, her parents want to see that you will be there for their daughter and future grandchild as a man.
Hiding away for months and not meeting them doesn’t display this.
5. Be informed
When you do end up telling them, make sure you have done your research into benefits you may be entitled to, job opportunities you may be applying for or how you’re going to work around your time so that you will still get to university classes etc
Your parents (or role model) will want to see what action you have taken to prepare for this event.
This is a true-life lesson: It’s not about what situation you’re in. What’s more important is what you are going to do about it, which counts.
Previously published on The Boss Dad Movement