Love is what is left in a relationship after all the selfishness is taken out. — Nick Richardson
Relationships can often feel complicated. It might feel like it’s never going to work out. It consists of two people that have emotional and physical needs. Both partners try to have some or most of their needs met within their romantic relationship. No matter how strong your connection is as a couple, maintaining that spark is crucial and equally challenging. All romantic relationships go through ups and downs. They demand a lot of work, patience, commitment, and a willingness to adapt and change with your partner.
While every relationship is different, no relationship is perfect. We have to accept this. We are humans after all. We make mistakes and hurt the people we love. But the breaking point of every relationship is when you make the same mistakes over and over again. No human is capable of tolerating the same mistakes, no matter how much they love you.
By doing these 5 things, you can improve your bond and ensure a quality relationship with your partner.
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1. Spend more time together
This is no brain teaser, this is an obvious solution to every problem couples usually face these days. Nothing can beat the face-to-face conversation you can have with the person you love and care about. Also, you fall in love by looking at and listening to each other, and it feels like a new experience each time.
Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope. — Maya Angelou
Choose a time to meet up for a cup of coffee or plan a proper date — anything that interests you and your partner — whether it’s daily, weekly, or monthly. Use this time to discuss the state of your relationship. Talk about everything that makes you happy, sad, elevated, and crazy! Have deep conversations and laugh over all the silly things. Appreciate one another and smile more often.
Many couples find themselves in situations where the face-to-face conversations of their early dating days are gradually replaced by calls, uninterested texts, emails, and instant messages. What people fail to realize is that this kind of communication is slowly drifting them apart. Nothing can beat the actual meetups! So go ahead and plan regular dates.
2. Maintain shared interests
At the beginning of a relationship, couples usually find themselves stuck to one other — be it in person or over the phone. They do not realize that there’s a world outside that calls out to them now and then. All they want is their partner. But as time goes on, it’s natural to drift apart and get busy with work and with other elements of life. This is one of the main reasons why people gradually lose interest in their partner.
To love or have loved, that is enough. Ask nothing further. There is no other pearl to be found in the dark folds of life. — Victor Hugo
In such situations, you can stop this dreadful process by purposefully doing more things together which both of you like and enjoy. Or you can try something new which interests you both — be it painting, dancing or even mountain climbing.
In case you have nothing in common with your partner, take a step forward, and be willing to try something that your partner enjoys. Most girls hate sports and get angry the minute the television is switched on. If you find yourself in such situations, give it a try and see if you enjoy it. And by doing this, your partner will understand how much the relationship means to you and will do the same for you in the future.
3. Compliment each other
When the honeymoon period of the relationship ends, couples, sadly, stop complimenting each other. Among endless things that people take for granted in a relationship, appreciating each other for small and basic things end. When couples stop focusing on showering compliments, expressing love and gratitude they once used to, one may feel one’s partner has changed.
With the whole world crumbling, we pick this time to fall in love. — Ilsa in Casablanca
But if you want to stay together happily, you will have to focus on the positives even if you don’t want to. When you compliment your partner, your partner feels loved and appreciated. Nothing can beat that feeling. Who doesn’t like to be adored?
Keep an eye out for finer details about how they talk and how they make you feel. Thank them for the littlest of things and express your love. Encourage each other to notice the good things and to say them out loud with a smile.
4. Be open to change
It’s essential to recognize that there will be ups and downs in every relationship. You won’t always be on the same page. Sometimes one partner may be struggling with an issue that stresses them out from head to toe. They might be upset, angry, and devastated all the time. No amount of encouragement, sometimes, fixes this problem. All your words seem useless and illogical in such situations. Different people cope with stress differently, and misunderstandings can rapidly turn to frustration and anger.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.― Robert A. Heinlein
Every person works through problems and issues in their own way. Remember that you’re a team. Continuing to move forward together can get you through the rough spots. Support them and help them, do not demean them while they are already in a state of loss. Try and resolve the problems with calmness and positivity, and rekindle the feeling of falling in love all over again.
5. Know that you make mistakes too
Sometimes being right isn’t as important as being compassionate. Whereas conflicts with your partner change, not every argument is a competition you need to win. At times, when you are trying to win an argument with your partner, you seldom realize that you are losing the relationship.
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. ―William Shakespeare
If you say or do something hurtful, talk about it, and don’t hesitate to apologize. You do not lose anything by acknowledging your mistakes. There is a bigger glory in apologizing and saving the relationship than merely winning the fight. Be the bigger person and set an example.
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Fight for what you want and love everything you already have.
Blessings and love!
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This post was previously published on Medium.com.
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Photo credit: iStock