
The word vulnerability sounds uninteresting in some people’s ears; they see it as the language of the weaklings. The reason is that people consider the term only from the surface point of view.
However, an in-depth observation of vulnerability reveals that people who understand the term have formed and maintained many great relationships through it.
Dr. Brené Brown — a professor and researcher at the University of Houston, United States, is an authority on vulnerability. She describes vulnerability as a birthplace. In her TED Talk on the Power of Vulnerability, she said:
“Vulnerability produces creativity, innovation, and change.”
I strongly agree with her.
The reason–when you open up, your partner, spouse, or friend will be ready to reason with you, and there is a higher tendency for him or her to open up too. This openness will create a new bond and lead to many other good things and discoveries.
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What Are the Blessings of Vulnerability?
1. Creations of A Twin Virtues
Intimacy and trust are essential in a relationship — vulnerability aids in facilitating trust. However, attempting to build connections while staying closed off is counterproductive.
Although cultivating Vulnerability will sound like you’re revealing yourself. But, in reality, it will eventually allow you and your partner to share deep intimacy and protect each other.
In addition, there is a close connection between trust and Vulnerability in a relationship. However, determining which comes first can be difficult. Both qualities work together to strengthen a bond. You can be more vulnerable with a bit of trust. And, with a bit of Vulnerability, you can build a stronger foundation of trust.
To feel comfortable in your relationships, you must go through this loop. You give an individual a chance to prove their trustworthiness with your details by being vulnerable.
In most cases, they would reciprocate the gesture, allowing you to confirm your trustworthiness too. In the end, this enhanced trust would increase intimacy between lovers, friends, or people in a relationship.
2. The Healthy Disposition
The fear of rejection or being judged is one reason vulnerability is so frightening.
Revealing who we are can be so scary. Nevertheless, we encourage others to put themselves in our shoes by exposing who we are. For anyone involved, Vulnerability fosters empathy and understanding.
We will better understand the many facets of each person’s story and carefully treat them with core care if they are more open. In other words, Vulnerability is like creating a way for people to access you.
Even a brief reminder that everybody has their own story can often be enough to inspire empathy. Empathy and understanding do not only contribute to better relationships, but they are also a reward of Vulnerability that brings about fulfilment in life.
3. The Impact On Self-Esteem
It may seem bizarre that expressing our innermost feelings, particularly our negative ones, will boost our self-esteem. But, yes, a sense of dignity is what will happen.
Causing ourselves to be seen is clear evidence we embrace who we are. Yes, revealing our thoughts may provoke some rejection from our friends or loved ones, and it may not.
But showing our feelings certainly gives our hearts freedom; the freedom produces confidence, which eventually creates a strong sense of self-worth.
4. It’s A Scanner
Everyone wants a sense of belonging,
but we sometimes confuse “fitting in” with “belonging.”
So when we want to blend in, we conform to the social environment rather than being true to ourselves and maintaining our authenticity. We do so because we don’t want people to criticise us for who we are.
A sense of belonging can’t be forced or bought; when you have it, you will know. Fitting yourself into a place you are not appreciated is like forcing yourself into a place you are not wanted. On the other hand, a sense of belonging is when people love and accept you just as you are.
Although being vulnerable can be frightening, it is essential because it helps you discover or know those who accept and are interested in you when you maintain your authenticity.
Sure! It can be unpalatable to do.
However, wouldn’t it be better to disclose who you are and let people reveal their actual impression of you than to risk spending time with people or someone who neither appreciates nor understands you?
Agree with me that you will reap a crucial advantage if you are vulnerable:
It helps scan out hypocrites and reveal people interested in you. Despite knowing your dirty linen, your genuine fans will remain supportive, positive, empathetic, and non-judgmental.
Moreso;
It is better that you are hated for who you are than to be loved for who you are not.
So, do not pretend to be someone you are not because the day people discover your true colour, they will hate you like shit.
5. It Opens The Door For Complement
No man is complete on his own, and there is no Mr. or Mrs Knows all.
God created us to depend on one another. Pride makes someone think he can do everything, so he neither needs nor seeks anybody’s help. You will agree that anything done by such a man, no matter how magnificent it might seem, remains incomplete because it is done from a singular point of view.
Such work will lack a variety of touches.
But someone who makes himself vulnerable indirectly calls for others to help him. Even if he’s a professional, what other people contribute will make a noticeable difference. The outcome is exceptional and perfect than when a single person does it. Furthermore, none of us is as strong as all of us, and two good heads are always better than one.
6. It Brings Freedom
Dr. Brene Brown opined, and I agree with her. She said,
“shame needs three elements to grow aggressively: “silence, secrecy, and judgment.”
I agree with her opinion because when you keep your secret emotion with you, it remains and takes full advantage of you. It keeps you hiding and engages your mind with different negativities. It makes you feel unnecessarily suspicious, especially if someone behaves fishy.
But if, on the other hand, you let it out, you first of all free yourself from its prison and poison, get help and support from people around you, work through your negative feelings and reactions, develop a better way to overcome it, and become your better version.
Yes, it seems so easy to say. But take or leave it; that’s what happens when you foster Vulnerability.
7. Enhancement of Easy Connection
Jyoti Khan of Tata Communications said that after almost two decades of dealing with leaders, he has discovered that for anyone to be a good leader, his organisation must look up to him and be motivated, but it is also necessary for people to connect to the leader too.
Vulnerability makes both of them more relatable, resulting in a closer emotional bond.
The reason is that a good leader is ready to do all it takes to connect with his or her followers. If such a leader makes himself vulnerable and wins his follower’s hearts, the leader’s action will motivate them to reciprocate. They can only achieve closeness when both parties are vulnerable; hence, their human relationships will be effective.
Conclusion
Vulnerability defines and determines the authenticity of your relationship, reveals the true impression of people about you, creates intimacy and trust, brings about empathy and understanding in the relationship, enhances our sense of self-worth, allows us to complement one another, it helps overcome negative feelings quickly, and enhances good human relations.
Thanks for reading.
What do you think about vulnerability? A blessing or a curse?
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism |
Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box |
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer |
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Photo credit: John Schnobrich From Unsplash
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism
Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer
