It takes a special kind of guy to catch and keep a woman whose passion is starting new ventures.
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“The beginning is the most important part of the work.” – Plato
I’m a serial starter. I love the excitement of starting something new. The thrill of a fresh new adventure. It’s tantalizing. For most of what I start, however, once the newness has worn off, I lose interest. Something has to really spark my passion to keep me interested longer than a hot minute.
It’s a really great trait to have. It’s always a great time to start something new! While I may not finish a lot of what I start, what I do finish rocks. If something holds my attention long enough for me to see it through — it’s going to be hard core perfection. And whatever I do contributes to my overall personal growth. Win-win.
This serial starting applies to all areas of my life, not just hobbies or professions. It also affects shampoo and conditioner and other hair products … and – yes – men.
So far, at least.
“Be willing to be a beginner every single morning.” – Meister Eckhart
Since serial starters crave newness, the thing they hate the most is feeling held back and suffocated. Men who create that atmosphere in a relationship will never win over or keep a strong, go-after-it woman. Ever.
For me and the women out there like me, it’ll take one hell of a guy to catch (and keep) us serial starting femmes.
He’ll have to understand and embrace the need for newness.
He’ll have to encourage starting new things.
He’ll have to applaud the effort put forth and what is accomplished, seeing it as a benefit to personal growth (not as just some project that was started and not completed).
He’ll have to have his own, separate interests that he regularly enjoys. You know, his own life – apart from his relationship. He’ll have to be able to give his partner all the space she needs, and know she’ll respect his space needs, as well.
He’ll have to have the self assurance to know that if we’re with him, we want to be there.
He’ll have to be a strong enough man on his own that he doesn’t need reassurance from his woman about the relationship. Emotionally intelligent, this man’ll be fine on his own when the serial starting lady takes off on a new adventure.
That’s one hell of a guy. But it will be one hell of a relationship!
“I want every day to be a fresh start on expanding what is possible.” – Oprah Winfrey
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Photo: Flickr/Steve wilson
Or alternatively – and I say this as a self-suspected serial starter – try being less of one
I mean honestly, isn’t this kind of waffle normally derided as “fear of commitment” when men do it? And yet here it’s a hallmark of a “strong” woman….
This is a strange article. I thought it would give some insights, and I guess it does, but reads more like a laundry list or list of demands. If I feel suffocated or held back by someone first I examine whether that’s me being unreasonable. I never expect someone in dating to be perfect, or live up to an ideal of perfection, and weigh what I like and don’t like to figure out whether they’re the right person for me. It’s kind of a contradiction, in my opinion, to state that a man should be strong enough to not need… Read more »