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All Wet (The 501 Poolside Blues)
Pete Wilgoren, South Pasadena, CA
From Dads Behaving DADLY 2: 72 More Truths, Tears, and Triumphs of Modern Fatherhood Copyright © 2015 Motivational Press. Reprinted with permission. By Hogan Hilling and Al Watts.
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We were running behind like always. One birthday party down and one to go.
The kids and I rushed home so they could put on their bathing suits and grab their goggles for a pool party to celebrate a nine-year-old’s birthday. I pictured a little backyard pool, but I was going to stay with them because I do not trust the “drop off” parties or pools I have not seen before. I just don’t.
We arrived and discovered it wasn’t a backyard pool. It wasn’t a backyard at all. It was an Olympic-sized pool at a community park, the type with platforms on the end and lanes to race in. I was glad I was there. My eight-year-old is an excellent swimmer and can race across the pool in deep water. My five-year-old, however, was still learning. She was great in the shallow end but loved to goof off and could not be trusted in the pool by herself.
Despite all the rushing around, I was sure I had thought of everything. This dad was cooking on all cylinders!
Standing there with two girls in their bathing suits, something was nagging at me, though. I wondered what I had missed. I put my hand in my jeans pocket while I pondered. What had I missed?
God, I love these jeans, so comfortable. Hmmm. Holy crap! I forgot my swimsuit! I am at the pool with two kids for a pool party wearing a pair of jeans. Holy crap! Damn! Damn! Damn! Damn! I was so busy getting the girls ready, and out the door, I forgot about me. Crap!
My eight-year-old swam off like a fish. My five-year-old had the puppy dog eyes because she was sad and ready to jump in too. I thought for a moment. I looked at the other party parents. I thought some more. I looked at my five-year-old. I sucked up any little sliver of self- respect I had and I went for it.
I went right into the pool with jeans, belt and all. There I was in my jeans and my five-year-old swimming around, happy as a clam. Some of the partygoers winced. The pool staff laughed and shrugged. But there we were. For the next two hours, I chased the five-year-old around the pool during the party in jeans.
When we got out of the pool, people gawked again. Jeans stick to the skin I learned. Jeans weigh you down like a denim albatross. I did the walk of shame while I got towels for the girls. I did not think to bring a towel for myself either.
We stood there and sang happy birthday to the birthday girl while a large puddle of water formed at my jean cuffs. Slowly I could feel a weight lifting from me as the jeans wrung themselves out. We said our goodbyes.
The birthday girl’s mom thanked us for coming and then proceeded to tell me that I was the highlight of the party. Her husband is a comedian by trade, and I told her I was worried I would be hearing about myself in a future routine. I grabbed the girls, and we sloshed right on out of there, leaving a set of wet tracks behind us.
Leather seats in cars love wet jeans. I put down towels and old clothes on the seat and sat right inside. It was all in a day’s work for this dad. It made me realize we do so much for our kids. Sometimes we need to make sure we are not forgetting something. Until then, just call me Denim Dad or the Dungaree Dad, or the dad who showed up at the pool party and found a unique way to overcome the 501 blues.
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Pete Wilgoren is Managing Editor at one of the largest local news stations in the United States. He has won several Emmy awards for his work in news, including an investigation into trucking safety, which went all the way to U.S. Senator Dianne Feinstein. He is also a husband and father, outnumbered at home by a wife, two little girls and a dog named Cupcake. You can find more from Pete at Dadmissions.com.
Hogan Hilling is a nationally recognized and OPRAH approved author of 12 published books. Hilling has appeared on Oprah. He is the creator of the DADLY book series and the “#WeLoveDads” and “#WeLoveMoms” Campaigns, which he will launch in early 2018. He is also the owner of Dad Marketing, a first of its kind consultation firm on how to market to dads. He is also the founder of United We Parent. Hilling is also the author of the DADLY book series and first of its kind books. The first book is about marketing to dads “DADLY Dollar$” and two coffee table books that feature dads and moms. “DADLY Dads: Parents of the 21st Century” and “Amazing Moms: Parents of the 21st Century.” Hilling is the father of three children and lives in southern California.
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Originally published in Dads Behaving DADLY 2: 72 More Truths, Tears, and Triumphs of Modern Fatherhood Copyright © 2015 Motivational Press. Reprinted with permission.
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Photo credit: Getty Images
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