In my home of Nigeria, there is a proverb that translates to mean, roughly, “When you grow up, you will discover why your dad couldn’t achieve certain goals you had expected of him.”
I grew up telling anybody who cared to listen that I would be a millionaire by age 30. I strongly believed that the deadline for me to achieve this goal was age 30. There was no other option . . . Case closed!
Many years later, now in my mid-thirties, I suddenly realized that I missed my prediction. I am not yet a millionaire!
The worst part of it was that I had lost focus so that I didn’t even realize I had missed my target until long after the deadline.
I have always been a hard hustler, unrelenting in my zeal to create a better life for myself. But the question that keeps bugging my mind is “What happened to me and my dreams, how did I forget that I was supposed to be a millionaire by age 30?”
I guess I can come up with a thousand excuses, if I want to. I got married before 30 and had my first kid, had some misfortune in business and lost a lot of money—even got into debt. There are always reasons for our failures in life, whether in business, marriage, and even our personal health such as being obese. I strongly believe that my loss of focus on my goal is what allowed me to miss my deadline.
According to a Goal Setting Theory Conditions, ‘There are essential circumstances that must be met to make goals successful in invoking motivation. These circumstances or mechanisms include:
- Goal acceptance/goal commitment
- Goal specificity
- Goal difficulty, and
- Feedback on progress toward the goal.
If I apply this theory, then I can easily comprehend why I failed in achieving my financial goal.
Still, I believe I am very close to being the man I had hoped to be. Being the best husband and dad I can be has been one of my major goals while growing up because I never experienced the love of a dad who was always away. I have been able to achieve this very important goal while being far from my financial goals.
I am a very proud husband to my wife and daddy to our kids, and even though I have my flaws, I can easily rate myself to be a wonderful family man. I have also been able to achieve my dreams of being a writer and an inspirator to the youth. I continually strive to be a better man.
I am still far from being the total man I hope to be, especially in regards to my dream of achieving financial success. Nevertheless, I believe that I am more than halfway along the road.
An earlier version of this post was originally published on the author’s website. This revised version is published with the author’s permission.
Photo credit: Pixabay