Imagine dropping a tightly filled water balloon from a great height and it hitting the floor. Think of the force of the initial bursting and the water shooting off in all directions. What might it feel like if the explosion was inside your body? That’s what happened to me this week. I was triggered by a seemingly insignificant thing that set off this intense tsunami of energy surging towards my extremities. Put another way, I had the feeling of anxiety. In short, I was triggered AF. However, this time, I enjoyed it. Well, I did and I didn’t but it was amazing to witness healing happening on the fly. It was an intense shot of the healing elixir.
The cause of this cacophony of feelings? A tag on Instagram. Now, bear with me, it caught me off guard too but I know in this work that I’m now releasing some deeply buried trauma. It’s a bit like peeling an emotional onion. The more open one is when something traumatic happens, the deeper it’s hidden, which often correlates with age (and smoking weed as it goes) but it’s not always the case. It’s not an exact science, far from it.
I did an IG story about a workshop I was doing called, “How to face self-sabotage and gain confidence in relationships” and I went to tag a person I’ve met recently, mainly to let them know about the workshop but also, as they have a lot of followers, them sharing it wouldn’t have been a bad thing but that was not the intention.
So, I pressed send and the water balloon hit, BOMB! I felt this surge rip through my body but this time, the reaction wasn’t, “Make that stop immediately”, it was, “Ooooh, what’s that about?” A game-changer with regards to perspective and the knock-on effect was thus. I felt very alive! With “negative” emotions admittedly but alive nonetheless. Like there was too much energy in my body which is, actually, exactly the case. I’d poked a Kraken from childhood and its stirring sent waves rushing through my body.
Old me = “WTF, shut it down, now!” (Hello, exercise)
New me = “Everybody going surfing!” (Hello, breathing to feel it and letting it be)
As I did that I compassionately inquired with my body, “What’s that about?”, instead of labelling the emotion too quickly. Essentially, the equivalent of waxing one’s surfboard for traction to enable one to stay on the wave (of emotion) and ride it out. In doing so, I had a memory of not wanting to be a nuisance as a kid pop to mind. A clue to the original trauma! A traumatic moment my body was currently reliving all from the press of a button. It seems, the thought of accidentally being a nuisance still has a charge for me. I have to say, seeing that it way and knowing I can ride the wave of letting myself feel it, instead of panicking, trying to fix it and shutting it down is a well-earned ability that, in all honesty, makes me want to cry with relief.
Our bodies are constantly trying to tell us things. Magic happens when we gain the ability to listen.
As always, there’s a practice below to help you on your journey.
Thanks for reading,
Adam (Follow me on IG @thevulnerabilityguy)
PRACTICE: Spring cleaning excess energy of emotions using shaking and/or shouting into a pillow.
WHY: Old me used to exercise to suppress. New me moves to encourage the residual energy of emotional triggers through the body — shouting into a pillow has the same effect. You see, once the initial blast has been witnessed, felt and recognised there’s sometimes still energy in our extremities that’s uncomfortable. Movement and shouting, encourage the excess to be on its way.
HOW TO START: Ride out the initial wave of emotions (that’s the hard bit), do some compassionate inquiry as mentioned above, and wait for the emotional waters to settle a bit. In waiting you tell your body you’re not afraid of feeling. Once things come closer to equilibrium again, then is the time to spring clean the residue.
Adam Slawson is a Transformational Coach specialising in Vulnerability and Authenticity in Relationships and the founder of Plight Club clothing. His mission is to redefine vulnerability. For more tools on tips to become better at expressing your emotions download his free e-guide here and/or visit his website here.
Living consciously and by choice instead of by habit is amazing but it takes practise. I’ll save you a lot of time and support you through the insecurity of change. If you’re curious about this work, book a free discovery call and I’ll answer any questions you may have…
BOOK A FREE DISCOVERY CALL HERE
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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