We’re adults. We are the boss of us — even if we don’t always feel that way. I’m puzzled why so many adults see that they have a challenge but don’t do anything to help make their lives easier. They choose to just rawdog life, as if there aren’t other options.
Until this year, I had every symptom of ADHD but no diagnosis and no treatment. I was out here rawdogging life and wondering why I was falling behind. My house was a mess. My garden was overgrown. I’d forget things I was supposed to be doing while working ahead on other projects.
I kept attributing my state of overwhelm to other things.
The latest stressful headlines. My financial challenges. Single parenting. Working multiple jobs.
I made excuses until I couldn’t anymore. I couldn’t complete basic tasks or focus on anything without multitasking. I was scattered and manic or lethargic and overwhelmed. This wasn’t okay. I needed some help.
Just over a month ago, I was diagnosed with ADHD and prescribed medication. I’ve been on medication for the last few years to manage a chronic illness, and it literally changed my life. The medication for that illness has kept me mostly symptom-free. At first, I was afraid to seek ADHD medication because I worried it would put my other treatment at risk. I didn’t want to mess up this careful balance I had.
But I asked my doctor about the potential for medication interactions and was assured that there weren’t any. I could be treated for my chronic illness and still be treated for ADHD symptoms that were messing up my life. I didn’t have to keep suffering without any help.
Once again, the medication was life-changing. It’s not an exaggeration. I could focus clearly, and I could complete one project before beginning the next. I could see tasks or events ahead of me and not experience paralysis at the thought of doing them. My mind was calmer than it had ever been.
I need the naysayers to shut up about medication.
That sounds harsh, and it’s meant to sound that way. Many people take their own bad experience with a medication and tell everyone without considering that their reaction might not be the norm. I often find that the people who are the most adamant about not taking anything weren’t willing to complete the process of finding the right dose or medication for treatment. They wanted a quick fix, and when that didn’t happen, they stepped up on their soapbox to warn everyone else away.
I used to be that way. I didn’t want to take birth control anymore. I bought into some of the myths around it. But my doctor told me it would help with my Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder, and I resisted. I had symptoms for an additional year because I finally agreed to antidepressants but wouldn’t take an oral contraceptive. Now, taking both of them has successfully alleviated the majority of my symptoms. I went from being incapable of functioning for two weeks out of each month to feeling “normal” and healthy again.
So, when I found myself resisting ADHD medication, I had to ask myself why. I wasn’t enjoying rawdogging these symptoms. It wasn’t benefiting me. There wasn’t a guarantee I would have any negative side effects if I tried a drug meant to treat it. Wasn’t it at least worth trying?
Within a few days of starting the medication, I was clear and calm. I wondered if this is what life is like for neurotypical people. Do they not have to fight against themselves to get the simplest things done? Weird!
But also: lovely! I could see a task that needed to be done and do it. I could focus on a single project at a time. I had better impulse control and interrupted less often. I was able to show up for the people I love more consistently than ever before.
We need to support people getting the help they need.
The problem with all the naysayers is that they spread misinformation and add peer pressure to medical decisions. Instead of doing what’s best for us, we may resist, telling ourselves that we’re doing the right thing. But maybe all we’re doing is making our lives harder because it seems easier than trying something new.
While medication doesn’t work for everyone, it does work for a lot of us. It’s worth giving it a try. I heard negative things about Adderall, but I tried it when it was prescribed. It’s working for me. I haven’t had any negative side effects. If I’d believed what I heard without giving it a chance, I wouldn’t be experiencing the relief I have now.
I know that healthcare is not always affordable or accessible. But there are plenty of tools we can use to help ourselves — whether we suffer from ADHD or something else. There’s therapy, medication, self-help books, support groups, and so many more opportunities to access assistance. A stigma shouldn’t stand in the way of us getting the help we need.
Life with Support
I still have ADHD. I will always have ADHD. But now, I have some tools to make things better — including, but not limited to, medication. I still have to learn to prioritize my tasks. I have to work on organization strategies that work for me. But I don’t have to do it alone or without medication.
It’s been an unexpected relief. I still feel like myself — only a little more put-together than I usually am. It’s a nice change of pace.
We don’t have to rawdog our troubles. Got anger issues? Try therapy, or check out a book from the library on anger management. Or perhaps learn to meditate.
Whatever our struggles, there’s help. For ADHD, that help is medication combined with therapy and other strategies. Sometimes, we just need to get out of our own way and be open to trying something new.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash
