Seeing someone getting arranged marriage might make you want to help them and stop it due to the toxic image surrounding it that they are being forced and they have no choice in the decision but arranged marriages and forced marriages are not the same.
They never were. People see arrange marriage as a bad thing and that it is forced. Whereas, this is not the case at all. It’s time to break it down. Arranged marriages are actually two parties consenting to marriage wanting to be with each other. The marriage decision does not go ahead if either party does not wish to marry the other.
Arranged marriages are quite common in South Asian countries like India, Pakistan and Bangladesh etc. It’s in the culture of these countries and their people. People happily accept the proposal of someone they don’t know. They get married and guess what? They live happily after. Before the wedding, there is a time where the two people can meet and get to know each other whilst in the presence of their families. It’s rare that two people blindly get married unaware of what the other person is like.
They have their first child in the first year of their marriage and that count keeps on going till eight or ten children within twelve years of their wedding. They might be shy on the first night of their weddings but the future is bright and crowded.
Marriage is the most beautiful bond in which two people can get. Even if it’s an arranged marriage, it doesn’t make the marriage any less special and beautiful. They both get to know each other whilst being in a lovely bond and get comfortable with each other quicker and eventually fall in love. Let me tell you a fact. India has the highest rate of arranged marriages around 93% and the divorce rate is just 1.1%. But what does that mean? That means that almost all arranged marriages are successful.
Whereas, if we talk about forced marriages. Forced marriage is totally different and forbidden. Forced marriage is a marriage when the parents or the family choose a spouse for you without your consent. It is abuse and it is not acceptable in any case. It is actually forbidden to force someone to marry someone they do not wish to.
In our religion, both men and women have equal rights to choose their partners. You, as a family member or a friend, can only give a good suggestion or advise them for their good but you can’t force them to marry someone of your choice. If either one of them is not happy with the decision then it cannot be done and if you have any part to do in a forced marriage then you have committed a huge sin.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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