There is an uneven acceptance of the changing role of husbands and fathers in households among men and society. Many men struggle with a household role that is very different from their grandfather’s.
Grandpa most likely brought home all the bacon, simplifying how he showed care to being a provider. However, the majority of American households include two full-time income earners. It’s been this way for quite some time.
In the meantime, women’s participation in the labor force has evolved. Efforts to advance women in high-paying fields have translated into changing household dynamics. The breadwinner in 38% of households is now a woman.
The lesson in the modern world couldn’t be more clear.
Showing your spouse and children you love and care for them requires much more than bringing home the bacon.
Husbands can show love and care for their wives with career ambitions outside the home by showing leadership in managing the home. Husbands do more than help; they take ownership of many of the tasks needed to run a household.
Fathers can show love and care for their children by being present in their lives each day. They take personal responsibility for doing the same caregiving women default to doing because of societal norms, working as a team with their spouse to love and care for their child.
We know through research that husbands are happier when they work as a team with their wives to manage the home and take an active role as caregivers.
We know the problem, we know the solution, but sometimes it’s hard to know where to start. Here are three easy first steps to show you love and care for your family:
Commit to one more daily chore
Women disproportionately take on more household responsibilities than men, particularly the tasks that never go away and require an emotional and cognitive load. Take grocery shopping, for instance. It requires knowing what is needed for the upcoming meals, taking the time to go, and gathering what others need.
Connect with your spouse and volunteer to own at least one task like this that she wants to let go.
Tackle one more kid management task
Attending sports activities and playing in the backyard with the kids are fun for husbands and essential to creating strong bonds with children. However, not all parenting is fun and games.
Connect with your spouse and volunteer to own at least one caregiving task that requires appointments, checkups, or meetings.
Lean into your kid’s play once more weekly
We recently recorded an episode of the Modern Husbands Podcast with Dr. Brenda Volling. Her research focuses on early social and emotional development, parent-child interaction, and family relationships. She has extensively researched the role of fathers and children’s development.
According to Dr. Volling, a father is the most important and enjoyable toy for a young child. Make an effort to continue to play with your kids, and lean into what they are playing with at least once more a week.
A better understanding of how caring can evolve our masculinity
On February 15th, from 8:00-9:00 ET, Dr. Gary Barker will host a conversation to address modern masculinity, explaining how caring can evolve our masculinity.
Dr. Gary Barker is the CEO and co-founder of Equimundo and MenCare.
He advises the UN, the World Bank, national governments, international foundations, and corporations on strategies to engage men and boys in promoting gender equality.
Event registration and attendance are at no financial cost to attendees.
—
This Post is republished on Medium.
—
Photo credit: iStock
