When I was still in a relationship, I used to wonder what it would be like to have to date again. Especially dating during quarantine — “That’s gotta be tough!” I’d think.
Flash forward to NOW, and it turns my hunch was correct!
Dating during quarantine is REALLY tough! Up to this point, I have downloaded the following dating apps: Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge. To date, I have deleted each of these apps at least 3 times, but possibly more. The cherry on top was seeing my ex on these apps as well.
Why do I keep downloading and deleting you ask?
Hope.
So far, dating during quarantine has been tough. It’s like normal dating with an added layer of complication. There are a TON of guys on these apps, but very few that I am swiping right on. The few that I do, only a small percentage reciprocate the “like”. Of that small percentage, only a few correspond.
I “connected” with someone the other day. Seemed really fun and funny. We exchanged numbers and texted a little bit. I noticed right off the bat that he asked me nothing about myself. I would ask him a question and he would respond. So I stopped messaging.
A couple days go by and he pops back up. We start talking about our mutual love for desserts and working out, and he wants to know when we are going to hang out. My first thought was: “Oh no. He’s a Trump supporter.” Which is the biggest dealbreaker of them all.
Turns out, he wasn’t. Whew. So then I explained to him that I don’t feel comfortable meeting up with people at this point and I’m not sure when that will change. I told him that if he didn’t want to get to know me any further that I understood. I didn’t think that would be a dealbreaker for him.
Well… I was wrong. He basically told me I was lame and the conversation came to a screeching halt. Even if he creeps back up, I am not responding. What a dick! It’s interesting that you can get a pretty good impression of someone based on these initial behaviors. To top it off, this dude is a dad and was formerly married. Wonder why that didn’t work out?!
On another app, I connected with someone who seemed mature and nice based on his profile. But then he wanted to literally meet the next day. When I told him I wasn’t comfortable doing that at this point and that I was trying to ease back into dating, he wanted me to tell him my process for acclimating back into dating, step-by-step. Ummm… no. I don’t even know what the process is yet.
And on all 3 of the apps I’ve used I have noticed that a large percentage of the guys on there were on there the last time I used these apps over 2 years ago. I have a great memory (for better or worse), and some of them are using the SAME pictures that they used THEN.
Dating during quarantine is tough, but the same problems still exist. This time around I am much more confident than I was 2 years ago. And thankfully so! If I wasn’t, I’m not sure how I would deal with being rejected because I’m not willing to risk my safety to meet up with someone.
I said “hope” is what keeps me going back, and I know this tale seems hope-less… but it’s only been a month. A lot of people are struggling right now. And honestly, I don’t mind being single one bit right now.
I love a good dating story — what has been your experience dating during quarantine?
For more stories and posts from me, follow me on Instagram and subscribe to my blog: https://jamiepittman.com/
—
Previously published on Medium.com.
—
***
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project and want a deeper connection with our community, please join us as a Premium Member, today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS. Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—
Photo credit: Kon Karampelas on Unsplash