Do you think you got a shot with her?
With your baggy loose-end jeans and bland personality. Basic.
The truth stings, so I’m just going to say it straight. In turn, you better listen with an open mind.
Average is the epitome of being boring. Boring guys often have little or not chance with the woman of their dreams.
But looks aren’t everything, and not everything is set in stone. Small changes here and there can lead to big improvements.
Physical appearance
Average looking guys do not stand out. They are not ugly by any means, but they are also not the type that would wow people.
I might sound shallow, but physical appearance does play a role in the dating scene. If it were you, would you go out with a woman who does not match your preference? Most likely not.
However, you’re not a Greek god, you’re built differently. So what happens then?
Well, don’t be discouraged; looks can be subjective.
Moreover, physical appearance is not just about your body — it’s also about how you care for yourself. So, play the cards you are dealt with.
Groom and style are things you can physically manipulate, and they can go a long way.
Putting extra effort into finding a style that fits you gives you personality. However, don’t overdo it, or you might look unlikeable.
Personality check
Although your physical appearance can earn you a good first impression on women, it is your personality that sticks.
Being tall, fashionable, and handsome are all great. But even with all the attractive physical traits, it won’t matter if nobody can stand talking with you.
Here are some characteristics to have to get you started:
- Humor
- Confidence
- Kindness
- Loyalty
- Intelligence
- Ambition
If you already possess these traits, then great! Just remember, characteristics tend to fall off over time. In other words, having these traits does not mean they will last, especially if not properly developed. Consistency is key.
Find ways to showcase them. Reveal your personality through actions, not just by telling people that you are funny or kind or loyal. Prove these things through everyday actions.
Being the ideal man
For a man to stand out, he not only needs to pay attention to his looks or personality. How he deals with life also matters.
People who see themselves as average often barely live their lives, much less shape the lives of people around them. As a result, they are not the men we desire.
Even though regular guys have many opinions about themselves and proclaim change, they rarely act on them. They just let life happen, taking blows and never returning one.
Average Joes may operate on a “what’s in it for me” principle, unable to take the initiative — selfish.
Moreover, when cornered, their fight or flight response kicks in. Instead of standing up and choosing to fight back, they often choose the latter.
Granted, some can change. However, it all boils down to motive, whether in his pursuit of power, profession, or women.
What separates an average guy from an ideal man is his ability to convey his emotions calmly, take responsibility for his actions, and put his ego aside.
Changes can be hard but doable. Do you have what it takes to be the ideal man, or do you want to remain the average guy who often feels he has no shot with women?
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
From The Good Men Project on Medium
 |
 |
 |
 |
***
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—–
Photo credit: jaikishan patel on Unsplash
