Everything seems easy in theory.
The resources did their job. They made you feel confident to stand in front of your crush.
Now, you’re standing there saying nothing or losing your nerve talking their ear off. There is never an ideal time to talk with a potential partner.
But you can finesse your approach. I’ve seen my friends refine their flirting skills with these dating hacks.
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Look people in the eye
It’s not weird. It’s about acknowledging the person who stands before you. Looking down or away fast feeds your low self-esteem habits. The minute you look away too soon, your mind overthinks.
Did my behavior seem odd? How did my action come across to the person? Will they think of me as shy? Did I bring attention to my nervous jitter?
Practice feeling like you belong in the spaces you occupy. Let people feel your presence. Establish social, emotional, and sexual bonds by holding eye contact.
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Gain simple behavioral and emotional intelligence
Your crush can fake their smile. People’s neutral faces may not be welcoming.
Learn to read people’s facial expressions and body language. It’s not for making assumptions. Instead, it helps you skip rejection when it is avoidable or take action when your potential partner is shy.
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Talk to strangers
No, I didn’t say talk their ear off. Learn to not interrupt by making enjoyable small talk.
Ask people questions. Experiment with different statements to see how persons react. Keep doing it until most people smile in response.
I know you want to go all Barney Stinson and think of the best one-liners. But be normal. Aim to practice typical conversation starters. Despite what your feelings say, your crush is a regular human being.
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Closure
Dan Lok is a sale closer. While other coaches talk about meeting new people, Dan stresses the need to have an impact. How do you end conversations?
This detail is essential. Fear causes relationship seekers to miss critical opportunities to make “the move” on a partner. It can also make a second meeting awkward.
Practice ending conversations for pleasant second run-ins. Ideal closures include:
- “I come to this store every week. I look forward to seeing you again.”
- “Can I get your number?”
- “I hope you have a great time at the BBQ you mentioned.”
- “I am a regular here. I wouldn’t mind seeing you again.”
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Take rejection with grace
You have two types of men: thick and thin-skinned.
Have you ever watched men on sidewalks who call out to women? Some will say rude remarks if the feedback is unfavorable.
Others won’t care if a woman does not reply or how negative her reply comes across. For the latter, it is a numbers game. The man knows; based on previous days, one woman will give him her number. So, he keeps going until he gets his daily win.
I am not saying annoy women to thicken your emotional skin. I’m saying play a game or do an activity where you don’t get phased by losses. It lowers your rejection recovery time.
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Thank you for reading this post.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism | Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box | The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer | What We Talk About When We Talk About Men |
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