Do You Go With Your Gut and Your Intuition?

I grab a cup of coffee and make my way to my computer. I’m restless. I can’t concentrate. I’m struggling with a decision I need to make. I’m confused. I need clarity.

I surrender.

I grab my AirPods and head outside.

I need space. I need to walk. I need to release all of my thoughts long enough (hopefully) to allow some insights to flow. I’m looking for the universe to guide me.

“God,” I say. “Speak to me. What should I do?”

Somewhere in my gut I know the answer. But I’m not sure whether to trust it. Am I projecting what ‘I want’ the answer to be?

Or is it my intuition?

My mind drifts back to the weekend.

I am visiting my son, daughter-in-law, and my new beautiful granddaughter. It’s hard to leave but my other son and I realize it’s time to go.

We decide to get a drink in their neck of the woods.

“Let’s go here,” says my son.

We entered one of his favorite restaurants. A few minutes later our drinks arrived. There’s a commotion behind us. We turn to see a young woman collapse as her friends dive to catch her.

They grab their phones to call 911.

Moments later the young woman opens her eyes.

I watch her friends struggle with their decision. They think she’s okay. But you can tell they’re apprehensive. They decide not to continue with their emergency call.

They wait a few minutes and help her to a chair.

“Your friend does not look like she collapsed due to drinking,” I say. “She came to almost immediately. I think you might want to make that emergency call to be safe.”

“You’re right,” says the young girl. “She’s only had one drink.”

The young woman collapses again. This time it’s more intense. She is out and her lips are turning blue. Everyone is scrambling. There seems to be a delay in reaching 911.

“There’s a fire department around the corner,” says my son. “I’m going to run there and get help.”

A few minutes later the firefighters arrive.

The young woman is alert again.

My son and I leave the restaurant. Her friends are on the sidewalk. Their faces tinged with relief because she’s in the care of those who can tend to her medical needs.

“Thank you,” they say.

“Of course,” we say.

I feel the need to tell them something.

“Listen,” I say. “I’m older than you. Your gut told you what to do but you questioned yourself. I did too when I was younger. If I could impart one thing it would be to listen to your gut. Your instincts were correct. You were smart.”

My words didn’t come from a place of judgment.

They came from experience.

One I’m grateful that I had. One that served me well over the years. I was a brand new mother. I called my pediatrician’s office and asked if they would fit me in.

I apologized as soon as my pediatrician entered the exam room.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “Thanks for fitting us in.”

“Do not apologize,” she said. “You are not an overreactor. When you called the office with a sense of urgency I knew you needed to come in. You need to always trust your gut. Trust your gut instincts as a mother.”

I never forgot her words.

Years later one of my son’s got pink eye. We had moved. I brought him to the new pediatrician’s office multiple times. Each time I was told it wasn’t pink eye.

“Shouldn’t I take him to see an ophthalmologist?” I asked.

“No,” they replied.

I thought back to my first pediatrician’s advice and called my husband.

“I need to go with my gut,” I say. “Something isn’t right. I’m taking him to another doctor and to an ophthalmologist.”

The ophthalmologist shook his head.

“Two more days,” he said. “And your son would have had permanent corneal cloudiness. Your son has the most severe form of pink eye you can get.”

My son would have had vision loss if I hadn’t gone with my gut. But I questioned myself because a doctor was telling me otherwise.

This is one example of how that advice served me over the years. There have been others both as a mother, and for me personally.

We have gut instincts.

We have intuition.

But it’s not uncommon for us to wrestle with it.

Case in point. I’ve just told a young woman over the weekend to listen to her gut. Yet I’m ignoring mine as I struggle with the decision I need to make.

I’m not ready to talk about that decision. I will be once I make it. It’s about my future. It’s about my direction.

But this piece isn’t about that particular decision.

It’s about our decision making. And whether you are someone who subscribes solely to linear facts, or internal intuition. Or a combination thereof.

How do you make your decisions?

What do you think is the right way to make major life choices?

And how do we ascertain when to question our gut, or trust it? Because some decisions (especially life decisions, and the direction we want or hope to go in) can be tinged with bias.

They can be laced with what ‘we want’ to be true.

What we want to happen.

Rather than the direction we are really be directed toward.

—

This post was previously published on medium.com.