Even With All That Pro-Men Talk, the Manosphere Is Surprisingly Anti-Male: Here’s Why

The manosphere has exploded into public discourse as of late. Partly thanks to the massively popular Adolescence — a Netflix series dissecting how young boys are radicalized into hating girls.

The once-fringe online community, made up of redpillers, pickup artists, men’s rights activists, and basement-dwelling, sexually frustrated men — aka incels — now stands as a major influencer on men, especially those within the 18 to 29 age range.

The central theme of the manosphere, that men must reclaim their power in an age hostile to masculinity, has proven so potent that it helped shift young men to the right, aiding Trump’s reelection.

At first glance, the manosphere seems pro-male. After all, the community loves to present itself as such, with all the rhetoric advocating for the reinstatement of traditional male authority.

But is it really pro-male?

I would say NO.

When you dig deeper into the talking points they parrot, it quickly becomes apparent they are anything but.

Let’s take a look at two common themes you often hear from within the community.

1) Body count

This refers to the number of sex partners a woman has had. The lower the number, the better, or at least that’s the impression I get when listening to these guys. However, what constitutes low is anybody’s guess.

2) Hypergamy

Describes the tendency for women to trade up or seek men with higher social status or resources. While the term “hypergamy” can apply to either gender, the manosphere uses it exclusively when referring to women.

They act as if men’s value is down in the gutter

The community’s portrayal of each of the three points above is problematic without a doubt. Instead of trying to understand the complexities behind these factors, they use them as tools to judge and shame.

But the biggest issue, beyond the negative portrayal of women, is that each point inadvertently also reflects men in a bad light, though I doubt most of them are even aware of this.

Let me explain.

The reason the manosphere, and to a lesser extent, men in general, chastise women with a high body count is rooted in the belief that purity in a woman is desirable. However, purity alone is not the most valuable trait. If that were the case, a eunuch would be the pinnacle of value.

And neither is it about the quantity of sex. A girl can sleep with one guy hundreds of times during a relationship and still be seen as more valuable than one with far fewer encounters, each with a different man.

Rather, men chastise women solely based on who they are having sex with. So, each fresh experience with a “new” man is another reason for her value to diminish.

But if men are the cause of a woman’s value diminishing, that would mean they are inherently valueless. Because if they had value, having sex with a man would not sully a woman.

It’s why you never hear the manosphere proclaim that a man with a high body count is worth less. For them, it’s not about the act of sex itself, but the power granted through sexual access by women.

When it comes to hypergamy, the connection between women’s inherent high value and men’s low value is not explicit, but it’s still there.

Unlike with body count, men’s low value is represented in the way the manosphere judges women who choose men they perceive as being less masculine, i.e., those with less social status, physical strength, or dominance.

They assume that by choosing less masculine men, women are displaying poor judgment, in that they are incapable of seeing the benefits of being with a “high value man,” thus lowering their perceived worth.

Paradoxically, most men who follow the manosphere are not even traditionally masculine, which means they are judging women for choosing to be with men similar to themselves.

How the manosphere fails to see the contradiction in their logic here is baffling, to say the least.

They would more likely tell a woman to choose the high-value man over the lesser option, even if it’s at their peril.

In reality, most women are not looking for the super-masculine alpha male type of guy.

Perhaps, if these manospherians actually listened to women, they would realize that traditionally feminine traits like being emotionally available, a good listener, respectful, and kind are more coveted.

Hence why I say, the manosphere is anti-male, at least in the context of interpersonal relationships.

Low self-worth is at the root

It really comes down to followers of the manosphere not seeing the value in themselves; hence, they cannot see the value in other men.

When men suffer from low self-worth, it becomes easy for them to project that onto others.

The fact of the matter is that the manosphere is a place for invisible men, those who feel marginalized, ignored, dis-empowered, the very type of men who feel valueless.

Its appeal lies in its promise to platform their grievances, whether with women, work, or society.

Sadly, what it ends up offering is more of the same anti-male sentiment they claim is perpetuated by society, just repackaged in a different form.