Reason No. 1.
When you train for the Olympics, it’s all about you.
When you’re a stay at home dad, it’s never about you.
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Reason No. 2.
When you have a bad day at training you often know why. The results make sense, and your coach’s job is to get you ready for tomorrow.
When you have a bad day raising kids, you seldom know why, the results often seem to be the opposite of the input, and your partner needs support at the end of a long work-outside-the-home day, not a session listening to you whine about missing school uniforms and screen time arguments.
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Reason No. 3.
When you train for the Olympics, you get up early, listen to your body, feed yourself, move through a day’s plan and a controlled environment, review your clear accomplishments, and return home to eat then sleep.
When you raise kids you get up early, listen to their screaming, improvise through a day’s rough plan and chaotic environment, then do the laundry.
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Reason No. 4.
“I’m training for the Olympics” is a clear identity in a recognized currency.
“I’m raising a family” is too. In some circles. If you happen to be a man, and don’t want to live your entire social life online, those circles can remain rather mysterious.
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Reason No. 5.
When you say you’re an Olympian, people think you’re amazing. A badass, a model citizen, an inspiration, worthy.
When you say you’re a stay-at-home-dad people wonder what you did wrong to lose your job and whether you ever wore the pants at all.
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Thank you for writing this!
Thank you so much for taking the time to let me know it found a home in your thoughts!
I’ve never even come close to Olympic dreams, but I am a stay-at-home mother, and I agree 100% with that side. I feel such inbslance, exhaustion, and invisibility in this role. When someone works outside the home, they are seen as productive, important contributors to society and the world at large. When someone stays home, they are seen as lazy, ungrateful leeches who don’t have anything worthwhile to contribute to the world. Never mind that raising children *well* takes a significant amount of labor, and getting anything else done is a nightmare when small children are around is a nightmare.… Read more »
Turns out raising kids well is the hardest job of all, and remains thankless until one’s own kids realize it…
Pretty much. Thanks for writing this. And also, forgive my atrocious typos – I was answering in the middle of the night on a tablet whose autocorrect consistently changes my words so they make no sense whatsoever. Lol.
Awesome! Loved it very much. I am a doctor and get far more respect when I go to work than when I stay at home with my kids. I even find it easier to lie at work when a patient asks me why I am not working the following day. When I say that I am at home with my kids I get all kinds of responses…just easier to say that I am working at another job.
Thanks jp.