I knew that I was not the only parent with a toddler who indicated that their tired but did not want to nap. I thought we had the perfect routine. My tot would get up at six on-the-dot every morning. And I would wash her up, then she inhaled breakfast and required another wash since she was a very sloppy eater.
We would focus on intervals of fifteen to twenty minutes of reading and play. When the weather conditions were suitable, we would go for walks or take a short ride to the local park to keep her busy for a few hours. Sometimes we would stay home and act out her favorite character Peter Pan, and I certainly had to play the part of Captain Hook. There was a lot of jumping around.
There was snack time, which consisted of milk, fruits, proteins, or a fruit bar. We would read another book and then play build-time. Build time is a motor skill activity that I designed for my toddler, and she would love it. She would frantically cry when it would end.
When she was an infant, I recall things being so much easier, and I would have little play workouts for a few minutes. Feed her, and before I knew it, she would fall asleep and wake up for another feeding. Of course, in between, there were plenty of diaper changes too.
Children are unique flowers that no petal e is ever the same. ~ Julio Borroto
It was not until I realized that I had waited for her to give me signals that she was sleepy. She would tug on her hair, rub her eyes, and cry hysterically over minor things. Then she would throw herself to the floor, and I thought, “Okay, it’s nap time.” Then she would not nap, and I did not put too much thought into it.
Then when she did not nap, she was too exhausted for dinner and wanted to go to bed at four in the afternoon. I realized I had to grasp better when her tantrums would begin; I thought that maybe I could fill that gap by keeping track of meals, activities, and the sleepy signs on a notepad to better determine her nap time. It was not easy keeping a record of everything we did, and it had taken three to four days to determine when she would start giving those “I am tired signals.”
Once I established that it was around 11:30 and 12:30, I made a few changes. It was touch and go at first since nothing seemed to have been working, and it was tough. I kept shorting playtime, assuming too much activity was the problem. Then a reduced sugar intake, followed by less build time.
Then nap time happened, and it was all by accident. As I got closer to nap time, I slowed down on the activities and reduced the snacks. I then realized that my little toddler was overtired and had thought she would be missing out on our activities, so she did not nap.
What came next was what I felt at the time, close to a miracle. So that she would get the hint that it was nap time was near, an hour before a nap, I would put her in pajamas and slow things down by reading a book or telling a story. I treated nap time like bedtime, with the same routine, and she would finally nap at noon.
My youngest daughter, Adelaide, wearing personalized Cucumber Specs, age two. Photo by: Julio Borroto
I was a new father, and it was the 80s, and there was no internet like there is today, and honestly, no one to turn to for help. My first daughter was the experiment that suffered the bumbling attempts of being raised by new parents. Two boys came after her, and they all survived and are thriving today.
Parenting is not an easy task, but worth its weight in gold when you are a parent. Understand them, listen to them, and most of all, try always to have patience.
Laid off and unable to find the perfect fit, I am now a permanent stay-at-home dad and once again a proud father of my fourth child and soon to have a fifth. What I know is from personal experience and nothing more.
For a Successful Toddle’s Nap Plan
· An hour before nap time, put them in their favorite pajamas
· A light low or no sugar snack
· Read their favorite book, or tell them a story about anything. Your family history works well; that will be your extraordinary story for them
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: My oldest daughter, Angelique, was two, eating pudding at her grandmother’s home. ( Julio Borroto)
