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The text message, “We are screwed” was sent to me by my “work wife” Patrice. She asked if I had seen the email. I responded back to her, “I did” read the email and even though I was very disappointed, my gut feeling all along was the project was not going to happen.
Taking a leap of faith is mentally draining.
Here is the thing: I essentially quit a job for a job that was not guaranteed. My question to you, Isn’t that what taking a leap of faith is defined as? Leaping into the unknown?
I am very transparent when it comes to sharing my life (sometimes a little too much sharing), and at the writing of this, my wife has stopped wearing her wedding ring. OUCH! What does this really mean? Her message is not a path to divorce, rather for me to be a better man and find work no matter what it is. I feel like a failure because of not having a day job, but it is not who I am. Am I a bad person? Am I selfish?
In my heart, I know God is leading or nudging me to the right path.
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Let me take a step back here. The text from Patrice was all about the 6-month training project that was potentially to run from April to October. The training company did not get the project. I was hoping that this would have worked out, but in my view, that would have been playing small. Wouldn’t you want your grandchildren to ask you to regale the story of how you “made it”? Playing small or not living up to your potential is no way to live your life.
Well, here is week three, and things are slowly starting to happen but no income to mention. For example, I was in a friend’s studio. I was given an opportunity but on spec (aka free) an audio version of a chapter of a book. If the author likes my voice and the talent my friend did as the sound, I could be doing voiceover work for audio books! That was a positive this week.
Today in my inbox there was an offer for a free coaching session on how to build up your speaking business. I was rejected! Why was I rejected for a FREE call? I could not afford their coaching fee. That hurt.
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Recently I was updating one of the MANY job boards that I subscribe to and thought about different job titles to look for. If I really had to work a “job,” what did that look like? I am a visual person. Then, as I was scrolling through all of these job titles, there it was. Two words that resonated with me was “Start-Up.”
If you read the first week then you might remember my friend Ben. He sent me a text connecting me with a friend of his who has a business. Guess what? “What?” It is a startup. YES! There could be an opportunity to have me work for his startup, teaching soft skills for job seekers.
There is no coincidence is my motto.
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My week as other weeks and even like your weeks has its ebbs and flows. We can be knocked down, but are you going to stay down?
Not to go into great detail yet, but I have had two major disappointments this week. One was a job I really wanted but was told they wanted someone with less experience. Their loss.
Having found my faith is really helping me stay motivated and positive. Even going through this week and being knocked down, the depression I normally would hit has not entered into me. I just keep plugging along as best I know how.
Even just trying to get this column to my editor: there is a recruiter sending me email after email of hoops I need to jump through for his client, so I could either get an interview or get passed on. I should care. Should I? Should I focus my attention on the back and forth the recruiter needs for the client but isn’t the client me? I honestly do not care because I had just gone through this a few days ago with that job I so wanted.
To some of you, this could be described as either an awaking or even finding myself (did not know I was lost). My thought is that Yes, I have found (No, I am not going to break into a U2 song here) what I have been looking for.
A while back “Jeff” advised me to go and find a “farmer.” Hold on, let me say to you that he did not mean a real farmer. A farmer is someone I could learn from. Going back to wanting to start my own business. Well, what about working for someone who has a business and “grows” from learning the how to? I hope that made a bit of sense because it could be very profound. Doing the soft skill training is the example. Learning how to build, run and grow a business is what I need at this stage of my business life. Profound or what?
Looking back at this article I see that I am all over the place but life is like that. The text message from Patrice can only be true if I let it become negative self-talk. Putting my trust, my faith, my life into the hands of God is all I can really do. Let me clarify that statement by saying that I have to be creating and not waiting for life to come to me. However, knowing that my leap of faith is going to eventually land me on both feet means trusting my faith.
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