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I was raised in the timber and mining country in northern Idaho. This was a tough environment to live in, let alone be raised in. Friday nights were payday and that meant tough people—and I mean tough people—who left work at the end of the day and went directly to the bars. One such bar would fill up to the point that every chair and table was occupied by six in the evening and would stay that way until closing.
These tough people would sit on their chairs all night and drink without relieving themselves. The result was rather nasty messes under those chairs. ‘Fight time’ began around 8 o’clock.
‘Fight time’ meant that these tough people would say something to each other and fists would fly, at will, hitting anyone who may be near, if they missed their intended target. During those brawls, men and women would spill out of the bar and into the alley.
Tough people for this story are both male and female. They worked in the mines or for various companies supporting mining and timber. Approximately one-third of the fights would include one or more females assisting a male. Not only would fists fly, clothes would be ripped off (perhaps on purpose) for one or more of the participants.
The police would show up fairly soon after the fights started and break the parties apart, and decide who if anyone would go to jail and/or to the hospital. I remember a number of times when bloodied people would be staggering down the street, to go home, as most of the downtown area consisted of small studio apartments.
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My upbringing taught me that men don’t cry. By the time a young boy would reach the age of 10 years, he was hardened by his dad not to cry. Often, he would be beaten for doing so, over and above whatever caused him to cry in the first place. Why don’t men cry?
Men don’t cry because they fear being seen as weak, girly, gay and many other names you have probably heard and do not bear repeating here. So, have you ever asked yourself what would happen to you or for you…because you cried? In order to answer this question, we get to take a look at stress.
There are basically two kinds of stress and they are, simply put, good stress and bad stress. Both types of stress are basically the same…only good stress, such as watching your team win, is short lived because we release the energy around those feelings. Bad stress, such as being a victim of your boss, can and will stay with you for longer and longer periods of time. Crying is a release of the stress being carried in the body. If not released in some way, stress can cause physical disorders including heart, stomach, liver, and kidney disease and emotional disorders including depression, Post Traumatic Stress, suicide ideation, and much more. With no healthy release of the bad stress, it’s also common to see the tough, aggressive type of people most often men and their behavioral disorders, as I described in my story above.
Women have generally been able to cry without being ridiculed, allowing their stresses to release. Men who cry experience a more centered life, free from a lot of diseases.
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I didn’t cry unless I experienced severe loss including the loss of my father and mother on separate occasions before I turned 24. I cried at each of their funerals and a couple of times when I broke up with a woman I was in love with. All of these were in private because “MEN DON’T CRY!” Right? WRONG! We do cry! We are human and can grieve the losses that come our way.
There were many times when I could not cry as I wanted to. I couldn’t even make myself cry. In fact, it wasn’t until I was 64 years old and just ending my own Repetitive Behavior Cellular Regression™ (RBCR) from one of my Master RBCR Practitioners that I was able to cry when I needed to. I am still a strong man for doing so. I am also much healthier both physically and emotionally.
What’s RBCR? Well, RBCR is a question and answer tool that finds hidden memories in early childhood that drive one’s behavior later in life. The BIG FOUR are Post Traumatic Stress, sexual trauma, suicide ideation, and alcoholism.
The fact that I can now cry when I feel the need, does not mean I have weakened in my manhood by any means. It means that “I” have the power over my physical and emotional health; they are not controlled by society’s influences.
To learn more about RBCR, visit Evolutionary Healer.
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Photo Credit – Getty Images