Here’s Why You’ll Never See Me Adopt a Pet

About a year ago, I decided that it was time for me to get a dog. I’ve been feeling very alone and wanted a fuzzy pal to act as a companion. I have a nice apartment with a dog run nearby, had the budget for upscale handmade food, and would have been with the dog almost 24 hours a day.

At first glance, this should have been easy. I mean, everyone is always talking about how many wonderful pets are left in shelters and get euthanized. So, the shelters and rescues should be elated that someone would want to get a pet out of there.

Imagine my shock when I found out that I would be rejected by a bunch of rescues for having an apartment, not having a kid, as well as having a husband who is a DJ. Apparently, they’d rather the dog die than have me give it a home.

My pet adoption experience was so terrible, it turned me against animal shelters and rescues as a whole. Here’s why and what I found out.

First, it’s really hypocritical that they wanted my money but didn’t want me to open my home to a pet.

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I’m going to point out the most fucked up part about all this. I was told that them rejecting me “was for the best interest of the animal.” They wouldn’t tell me why I was being rejected aside from the fact that I lived in an apartment.

I did my research. I knew which breeds are the most apartment-friendly. I told them I would do exactly what the rescue or adoption agency wanted of me, to the letter. Somehow, that wasn’t enough.

Then the adoption agency, after rejecting me and basically having me cry over the phone after being picked apart and being told I was worthless as a pet owner, had the gall to send emails to me asking for money.

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So, my home and my funds are not enough for one single pet, but you want me to give you guys money? Okay. I’ll donate when pigs fly. I later found out that most people experience tons of rejection before they get a dog of their own through a shelter or a rescue.

I don’t think rescues or shelters really care about the animals in them.

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Maybe it’s just me, but I find that a lot of the people who do this have a very narcissistic and “holier than thou” attitude. I can’t name how many of these rescue agents made a point of saying that I wasn’t enough to own a pet, often with a side of attitude.

It made me realize that a lot of the “rescue types” tend to do this to flaunt what a good person they are. The animals in question are a prop to make them feel better. And it makes them feel better knowing that they can reject people just because.

Studies show that relaxed adoption standards are better for pets. If these rescues really cared, they’d be more lax about their standards. More animals would get a home. While some animals would be returned, they would at least be out of the system enough to get individual care.

The truth is, the whole “rescue pet” thing is a way of showing that “Hey! I’m a good person look at me!” It’s valiant in its efforts, but I’m sorry, I’m not going to be crucified and picked apart just so I can have a pet. It’s a luxury item and a status symbol.

Oh, and let’s not forget that there is a whole fucked up market on rescue pets.

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Did you ever notice how many shelters are filled to the brim with “problem” dog breeds or very large dogs? This is not how it is supposed to be. Most of the smaller dogs (like Dachsunds or Minpins) actually get snapped up by breed-specific rescues.

Among “rescues” there is a term called “puppy flipping” or puppy laundering. These rescues will adopt cute, small dogs from rural areas en masse, then bring them up north to “adopt” them out at larger prices. Most state-funded shelters also allow them to get dogs before others do.

Why? Because they’re rescues.

So, automatically, this bars regular people from getting the pets they want at a price they want. Now, you have to go to a rescue that is a lot more choosy. You might not even get a call back. I know I didn’t.

The price of a rescue is now starting to get into the same league as the price of a pet from a breeder in many cases. So, any discount you could hope for is gone too.

If you found yourself crying hysterically over not getting a pet from a rescue or shelter, you’re not alone.

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I have gotten plastered drunk over it. I’ve cried. I’ve wailed. I’ve openly admitted it fucked with me. If I were honest, I have a light case of PTSD from being told I’m a bad person for wanting a pet and a bad pet owner for getting rejected so many times.

Adoption rejection hurts like hell. And while I know that we’re not supposed to take it personally, how the fuck are we not supposed to take it personally? Like, really. The basically judge us based on completely arbitrary, frustrating standards then decide we’re not worth it.

And the worst part is, we often get attached to pets that we later find out we can’t have. I’ve had to throw out dog food and leashes more times than I can count, simply because it was so heartbreaking to look at those supplies without a fuzzy friend around.

After a while, I decided that it’s better not to even bother with agencies. I mean, how can I keep hurting myself like that for a pet that probably would never come?

As of right now, I’m in talks with the spouse about buying a dog or a cat.

Photo by Mikhail Vasilyev on Unsplash

After having been told that I’m not “enough” for a rescue or shelter pet, I’ve decided that animal rescues and shelter are not worth my donations or efforts. It sucks, because a bunch of innocent animals are being punished for the shelters’ shitty behavior, but hey, what can I do?

I wanted a pet. I know I’m a great pet owner. My husband grew up with dogs and I grew up with cats. There is a literal statue of Bastet on my bedroom’s shelf because I literally worship cats as part of my pagan religion. What more can you want?

If people don’t want me to save an animal, fine, I’ll buy one and give it a great life. Shopping means you don’t get treated like shit. If that upsets you, please take it up with all the rescues that rejected me and gave me hell for wanting to do the right thing.

I’ll be fair. If anyone reads this and works at a rescue or shelter and wants to give me a healthy, young adult animal to care for, I’m open to it. Seriously, DM me. In the meanwhile, I’m going to be searching up breeders.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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