How you honor your parents is one way to show love for your country.
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By Michael I. Moffett, (LtCol, USMC, ret)
Honoring thy father and thy mother
The sense of what constitutes an American family has certainly broadened since I was born in 1955. Two parents and their children then constituted the nuclear family. But versions of what constitutes a modern American family are now too numerous to mention.
And regardless of how one defines family, every family is unique. So is there ANYTHING now common to EVERY family?
Yes. Every family member has two biological parents. That those parents should be valued by their offspring is a universal ideal—but like most ideals, it’s one that often contrasts with reality.
Too many American parents are forgotten, neglected, or even abused—which certainly conflicts with that ancient pronouncement to “Honor thy father and thy mother.” It also conflicts with other cultural norms that collectively honor or revere parents. But as America celebrates the “individual,” it thus falls to the individual (“me”) to honor one’s parents.
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Too many American parents are forgotten, neglected, or even abused—which certainly conflicts with that ancient pronouncement to “Honor thy father and thy mother.” It also conflicts with other cultural norms that collectively honor or revere parents. But as America celebrates the “individual,” it thus falls to the individual (“me”) to honor one’s parents.
After turning 60 it occurred to me that I was unique in that my parents were still around to celebrate that milestone with me. The vast majority of my contemporaries had lost one or both of their parents. And as the greatest lesson I’ve learned in 60 years is that practicing gratitude and embracing wonder produces endless benefits, I thought I should apply that lesson and truly appreciate my folks.
So who were these folks?
My father, Don, was born in 1926, during the Coolidge administration, in a small northern New Hampshire mill town. Like so many from that so-called “greatest generation,” he was a World War II (Navy) veteran. A splendid athlete, he then became a prep school sports star, playing basketball in the old Boston Garden and attracting the baseball interest of the Philadelphia Phillies. But when his father died, he honored his mother by relinquishing his sports dreams and returning to the North Country to sell insurance and work in the paper mill.
My mother, Marguerite, was born in 1930, during the Hoover administration, also in northern New Hampshire. Her farm family, like so many others, was ravaged by the Great Depression. Her own mother died when she was a teenager and at 17 she became a surrogate mom to four younger siblings. She still somehow found a way to make it through the region’s top nursing school to begin an extraordinary career in health care in 1953.
My parents wed in 1954 and their 62-year marriage featured the inevitable trials, tribulations, and triumphs one would associate with any such partnership. Their union produced four children, three sons who became United States Marines and a daughter who earned two doctorates.
In their seventh decade of marriage, in different ways, they still provided strong support for their children—and grandchildren. This rated more than just gratitude. It rated wonder!
Thanks, Mom and Dad! Every family is unique, and no family is perfect, but ours was—and is—WONDERful!
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Michael Moffett (LtCol, USMC, ret) is the co-author of FAHIM SPEAKS: A Warrior-Actor’s Odyssey from Afghanistan to Hollywood and Back. His writing partner, Fahim Fazli, is a Hollywood actor who returned to his native Afghanistan as an interpreter. A 1991 Desert Storm veteran, Moffett returned to active duty in 2001 after the 9/11 attacks, when he served on the Central Command staff for General Tommy Franks. He served in Afghanistan in 2010, when he met Fazli. A New Hampshire native, Moffett is a college professor and columnist.
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Photos by Michael Moffet