Imagine waiting all night for a text that doesn’t come.You’re lying in bed, hoping that your significant other will text you and tell you everything’s okay. But that text doesn’t come until the next morning, and you feel like they’ve given up.
They forgive you for your apology, but your heart is so damaged that it’s hard to will yourself to feel okay.
That’s what happened to me when I told the same woman I called my soulmate that “we should stop talking.”
I’ve never had any regret bigger than this one.
Try to view arguments in a healthy light.
Arguing with your significant other is completely normal. Think about it this way. You’re going to have issues that come up in any relationship you commit to. It’s all about whether you’re willing to keep fighting for them.
With my woman that I see spending the rest of my life with, I had the wake-up call to continue fighting for her no matter what. When things come up, and you have to deal with them, words don’t go a long way.
Actions speak louder than words — we all know this, yet it takes some of us (me) extra time to realize it. Admitting when you’re wrong is one thing. But surprising your woman at work with flowers, giving her little gifts you know she’d love later that day, and noticing little things about her goes a long way.
Not every argument needs to end in moving forward without making amends and compromising. It’s much more likely to forgive someone when they show you how sorry they are when they go to great lengths to bring your mood up.
Your attention, love, and little signs of effort go a lot farther than any expensive date, expensive iPhone, or anything else would ever do. If you’re with the right person, then you don’t need any fancy vacation to make it work.
Just sitting in the car with my significant other, listening to music, and appreciating each other for existing is just as magical as going to Disneyland.
Never stop putting in the effort.
Letting your significant other know that you love and care about them is different for everyone.
Do you know their love language? This is a great starting point because if you aren’t aware of their love language, you might miss the point. The five love languages are:
- Words of Affirmation
- Physical Touch
- Receiving Gifts
- Quality Time
- Acts of Service
In my relationship, I love physical touch, words of affirmation, and quality time. She’s made sure I feel the love in all of those ways, and it makes me sad that I wasn’t doing enough until I had my wake-up call. We have very similar love languages.
One thing I lacked in my relationship was the gift-giving aspect. I’m not talking about anything crazy expensive, but I’m referring to the Hello Panda Snacks she loves, the Bic Gel Osity pens she raves about, and the pink flowers with a pink vase since that’s her favorite color.
The fact that she got me balloons for hitting my 1k followers on my blog shows that she celebrates me and thinks incredibly highly of me. I think incredibly highly of her and told her consistently because I meant it, but the actions weren’t lining up.
Show your significant other you truly want to give them the world by paying attention to the little things. They’ll go a much longer way than simply telling them — but again, that comes with knowing their love language.
Don’t let this be “the one that got away”.
For the few days that I was without her were some of the toughest days in my entire life, and I’ve been through so much.
You don’t just call someone your soulmate, plan your future together, and then drop them. That’s what I did, I regret it every day since, so don’t make the same mistake I did. Try and make things work.
Every love story has a happy ending, and I ended up not letting her get away, and I will never stop showing her know how much I love and appreciate her.
There’s always a happy ending!
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This post was previously published on medium.com
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