How You Know You’re Turning Into Your Mother

When I was growing up, I told myself I’d never turn into my mother. But here I am, with a cabinet full of grocery bags and an unnatural excitement for a 30% sale on green seedless grapes.

If you’re like me and you’re slowly morphing into your mother — don’t worry — it’s not all bad. Your mother is probably a really wonderful person and there are far worse things you could turn into.

How do you know that you’re slowly turning into your mother? Here are some tell-tale signs.

1. You’ve started clipping coupons like your life depends on it. These days you refuse to pay full price for anything. Your mom once got paid by the store because she had a $5 off coupon for an item that was on sale for $3. Nowadays you’re on the hunt for every discount and good deal you can find, and in search of the Holy Grail of getting paid by the store at checkout—just like your mom.
2. You’ve started hoarding plastic containers. Your mom used to keep every yogurt container and margarine tub, and you thought it was ridiculous. But now, you find yourself washing and reusing every plastic container that crosses your path. You never know when you might need to store some leftover soup, and that old margarine tub is looking pretty good right about now.
3. You’ve started examining every bottle and can for redemption value. Your mom used to collect cans and bottles for spare change, and now you’re doing the same thing. It’s like a grown up treasure hunt, and you feel a sense of satisfaction and excitement every time you turn in a bag full of aluminum cans. I mean, who needs a Roth IRA when you’ve got an extra large recycling bin?
4. You’ve started wearing an apron when you cook. As a kid, you probably thought that aprons were only for grandmothers or chefs on TV. These days though, you find yourself reaching for one every time you’re preparing a meal. It’s like a badge of honor, and it’s great for keeping oil stains off your shirt.
5. You’ve started looking forward to home improvement projects on the weekend. Mom was probably always doing some kind of home improvement project, like rearranging furniture, fixing leaky faucets, or painting every wall in the house a different color. Now you find yourself getting excited for a weekend trip to Home Depot to pick up supplies for your DIY home improvement project. You even have a special fanny pack for your tape measure and level.
6. You’ve started using some of the same expressions she used to use. You’ve likely told your kid, “we have that at home!” I told my daughter the other day and I cringed when I realized my mom used to say that to me, literally every time we went to the store and I asked for something. Now you’ve started to say it to your spouse when they suggest buying something unnecessary. “We have 50 plastic containers at home, why do we need more?”
7. You’ve started wearing comfortable shoes. Gone are the days of wearing what’s trending or squeezing into uncomfortable shoes. These days you’re all about arch support, a sturdy, soft heel, and an extra wide toe-box.
8. You’ve started talking to yourself. Your mom used to talk to herself when she was driving or shopping, and you always made fun of her for it. Now you find yourself reciting your grocery list out loud, asking yourself where you put your keys, or even having full-on conversations with the rearview mirror.

So if you find yourself doing any of these things, don’t worry about it too much. It’s just a clear sign that you’re slowly becoming your mother — for better or for worse.

And who knows, maybe someday you’ll even start reusing aluminum foil and ziploc bags, using a butter knife as a screwdriver, or calling your kids by their full names, just like your mom used to do when you were in trouble.