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When Donald Trump was elected president I kept telling people, “There’s hope. There really is. It’s going to all work out.” One sunny morning over a piping-hot cup of coffee, I said, “Watch. President Trump will turn out to be great. We’ll be surprised.”
I didn’t think things would work out well because I voted for him. I’m a Democrat. But I had hope. Hope that the president would settle himself into the Oval Office and the weight of what he’d just accomplished would begin to rest on his shoulders. Hope that there would be a maturity, some growth.
And then there was the pissing contest about crowd sizes. And the Muslim ban that’s not a Muslim ban. And then the President fired James Comey. And Russia started to blow up. Then Spicer. The tweeted transgender military policy. And Scaramucci. And North Korea.
Most recently, there was Charlottesville followed by silence followed by that Q&A at Trump Tower which told us all what we already suspected: the President has a soft spot for white supremacists and other crazy types.
These last 200 days, I’ve had the chance to spend a lot of time reflecting about how Mr. Trump won the election. It’s been in those long reflection times where I’ve been forced to think long and hard about who voted for him and my feelings about it.
I run in some conservative Christian circles, and I live in an area of the country that’s immensely Republican. There are many times at social gatherings where I’m the only Democrat in the room and the only one who thinks that the President is doing less than a stellar job at managing the country and balancing foreign affairs. And so I’ve heard a lot pro-Trump talk. I’ve read a lot of pro-Trump rationales. I’ve listened to my Christian friends defend the president, citing that he’s God’s choice. They’ll quote modern-day prophets like Lance Wallnau, who believes that Donald J. Trump is like the Persian King Cyrus from Biblical times who decreed that Jews could return back to Israel and rebuild the temple. Trump is going to rescue the people and rebuild the nation. I’ve had to come face-to-face with the reality that I have friends and family who voted for Trump. And I won’t lose friends or alienate family over differences in political ideologies.
A Coping Mechanism: Ora et Labora
There’s this Benedictine motto that I love. It’s Ora et Labora. In Latin it means “prayer and work” or “pray and work.” It’s beautiful because those who follow the order of Saint Benedict take both their prayer times and work time very seriously. And the two are both complementary but distinct. Saint Benedict taught his brothers that one must not allow prayer or work to dominate the other; however, one can spend time in contemplation and prayer and one can spend time in work and the two can cross-over.
Ora
It’s helped me tremendously to spend time in my office alone in prayer. Alone and contemplating how God fits into our current political climate, and not just “Why, God? Why?!” prayers. I’ve been able to sit in silence and think about how many of my friends allowed their faith to shape their politics and why their faith led them to Trump. In some of my more contemplative times, I’ve been angry and then sad and then depressed and terrified. But I’ve been able to come to a few conclusions that help me:
1. My friends and family aren’t racists, bigots, or white supremacists. I know this because I know them. I’ve spent time with them, I love them, and I know that each and every one of them loves God and loves people. There’s something to be said about having direct, yet respectful, conversations with people about how we spend our time at the ballot box matters and that elections have consequences, but I know that those with whom I have a relationship aren’t bigoted hatemongers. And I love them for that.
2. For many of my friends and family, a vote for Trump simply meant that it wasn’t a vote for Hillary. A lot of people just didn’t trust HRC. A lot of people just couldn’t wrap their minds around voting for Hillary even though they didn’t necessarily feel very warm about Trump. It’s not very good politics to vote this way, nor is it the most responsible way to wield the power of the vote, but I’ve realized that that’s what happened in some instances. And although I disagree with that specific voting tactic, it’s comforting to know that there’s not that many in my circle who are necessarily on the Trump train.
3. Some of my friends and family legitimately like the President. Some of them just like the guy. They are able to see past his brash and abrasive handling of democracy. They like that he “speaks his mind” and doesn’t look like a stuffy politician. A good number of them honestly believe that he’s going to bring unmerited amounts of good and blessing into our country. And the fact that he’s likely a white supremacist-favoring hate monger? They just don’t believe it. They have all the feels for the guy. And though it’s this point that drives me crazy, there’s still some comfort in it. Because I can go back to point one and know who my friends and family are, and I know they’re good, decent people who care about our country and did just what politicians tell us to do on election day: they voted their conscience.
It’s for these reasons I have my sanity and I’m not unfriending half my social media friends lists. It’s a daily contemplation and a daily prayer for peace for our country and understanding on the part of the people about who our president is and for him to get his act together.
Labora
The work doesn’t stop. We all get up in the morning and go to work and have meaningful conversations and we stand up as one people and fight for our beliefs. I bring my prayer into my work and allow that peace to follow me when more breaking news from the White House scrolls across CNN.
I look toward the next election—we have a senate and gubernatorial race coming up next year that’s starting to heat up. So I’m finding the Democrats I can align with and I’m getting involved. I’m going about my work as a teacher and working hard to do right by my students and teach them fairness and empathy; diversity and inclusion.
In this political climate, don’t get depressed and angry. Contemplate, pray, and work. To get the right job done, it’s going to take work done by people who know exactly how to fight the good fight.
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Photo credit: Getty Images
Nicely balanced article full of grace, acceptance and hope. Thanks, Mr. Doty!
That is one truly RIGHTEOUS post. Thank you for it. On the flip side, I’ve read (and cringed at) countless UNRIGHTEOUS posts here from people who call themselves liberal, progressive or whatever. There is a regular poster here – actually a Christian pastor whose name escapes me at the moment. He actually wrote a post boasting about how he unfriended family and friends on FB who voted for Trump rather than Hillary. Apparently, he thought this was a sign of his virtue in some way or another. There’s a lot of that going on right now – on both sides… Read more »