Do you ever get that feeling when you see someone for the first time? That feeling of intense attraction, where all you can think about is how you want to rip their clothes off and have your way with them?
Chances are, that’s lust. Lust is an intense physical and emotional response to another person. It’s often driven by hormones and can be very powerful. Love, on the other hand, is a more complex emotion. It’s based on feelings of affection, intimacy, and commitment.
So how do you tell the difference between love and lust? Let’s take a closer look!
“Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love”
― Gabriel García Márquez
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Lust is almost all about physical attraction.
Some people believe that lust is nothing more than physical attraction. They argue that when you are attracted to someone, you cannot help but think about their physical appearance. You may admire their curves or the way they move.
All you can see is their overall attractiveness. While it is true that physical attraction is a key component of lust, it is not the whole story. Lust is also about craving someone’s attention and wanting to be close to them. It is an intense yearning that can be all-consuming.
When you are in the grip of lust, you may constantly think about the object of your desire. You may even daydream about being with them in intimate situations. So while physical attraction is important, it is not the only thing that defines lust.
Love is more than just physical.
Love is often viewed as a purely physical emotion that is felt only in the heart. However, love is much more than just a feeling. It is an action, a decision to care for another person. Love is patient and kind; it does not envy or boast. It is not rude or self-seeking.
Love is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. True love is not based on physical attractiveness or external factors. Rather, it is built on trust, mutual respect, and a shared commitment to each other’s well-being.
When the cupid’s arrow pierces through our hearts, we are willing to sacrifice our own needs for the sake of their happiness. We overlook their flaws and accentuate their positive qualities. That is what makes love so special — it is the ability to see the best in another person and to bring out the best in ourselves.
Lust is mostly based on neediness and insecurity.
While love is often described as a wholehearted and all-consuming emotion, lust is usually seen as its less virtuous cousin. Instead of being driven by affection and admiration, lust is often based on neediness and insecurity.
When we are attracted to someone, we may project our own insecurities onto them, seeing them as the perfect remedy for our feelings of inadequacy.
We may also believe that this person can “complete” us in some way, filling a void that we feel deep inside. Of course, these are ultimately just illusions, and trying to base a relationship on them is almost guaranteed to lead to disappointment.
When we can accept ourselves for who we are, we will be much better equipped to find a partner who truly loves and respects us — not someone who just satisfies our temporary needs and insecurities.
Love is based on care and respect.
Love is one of the most powerful emotions we experience as humans. It has the ability to make us feel happy, sad, angry, and everything in between. But what exactly is love?
Some people might say it’s a feeling of strong attraction, while others might say it’s more about caring for someone and wishing them well. In reality, love is likely a bit of both.
After all, it isn’t easy to care for someone if you don’t feel any attraction to them. And similarly, it’s difficult to feel attracted to someone if you don’t care about their well-being.
So perhaps the best way to think about love is as a combination of care and respect. Loving is not only having positive feelings toward them, but we also want what’s best for them.
We want to see them happy and healthy, and we’re willing to put in the work to make that happen, even if it sometimes means sacrificing your own needs.
Lust fades over time.
Anyone who has ever been in love knows that an all-consuming passion often marks the initial stages. Every waking moment is consumed with thoughts of the object of one’s affection, and the slightest touch can send a thrill through the body.
However, over time, this passionate intensity often fades. The everyday reality of living with another person can take its toll, and the novelty of being together is wearing off. For some couples, this loss of lust can be difficult to overcome, but it doesn’t have to be the end of the relationship.
With a little effort, it is possible to reignite the spark and recapture the magic of those early days. By spending time together, being more communicative, and keeping things fresh and exciting, it is possible to keep the flame burning bright.
Love grows stronger over time.
Love is a strange and wonderful thing. It can fill us with happiness and joy, or it can cause us pain and heartache. But no matter what form it takes, love is always worth fighting for. And as anyone who has ever been in a long-term relationship knows, love only grows stronger with time.
The longer we are with someone, the more we come to understand them — and the more we come to appreciate their good qualities. We also learn how to weather the storms that inevitably arise and how to resolve conflict constructively.
Over time, our love deepens and matures until it becomes something that feels essential to our very existence. So if you’re lucky enough to find love, cherish it — because it just might be the most potent force in the universe.
“Of the seven deadly sins, lust is definitely the pick of the litter.” — Tom Robbins
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The Bottom Line
Love and lust are two powerful emotions that can hugely impact our lives. Though they may seem similar, there are actually quite a few differences between the two.
Love is often more stable and longer-lasting than lust, which tends to be more fleeting. Love also generally involves a deeper emotional connection, while lust is primarily physical.
Of course, there can be some overlap between love and lust — it’s possible to feel both at the same time for someone. But in general, these are two distinct emotions with different effects on our lives.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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