When you write a blog, sometimes you have encounters with people that surprise you. Mike Crider had one of those encounters this week.
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I was contacted by a guy who does work in reality television and asked me if I thought I would make a good reality show (I can’t make this stuff up). I thought I would, but no one has ever asked me that. I really thought it was spam at first, so I wrote a snippy email about the possibility of making a mistake and all of this stuff, but sarcastically implying that I was interested.
He wrote back, indicating he meant to reach out to me. He asked questions about what my family dynamics were, what my characteristics were, and if I related to a TV personality. I thought about the question a lot, gave an honest answer, but had a hard time relating my personality with that of a TV person. I also talked about how my twins were completely different from each other and that my personality was a little like Conan O’Brien if I had to really stretch it out … needless to say, nothing stood out to him and we agreed that the chances of us becoming a reality show were not good.
I’m not knocking the guy by any stretch, he didn’t have to write an email to me, and I’m very grateful he did. If he’s reading this post by any chance, I want him to know that. I’m pretty real and transparent in my blog posts, and I write about what happens to us as a family. But, I’m not Snooki, nor a Gypsy, and we would not make for good television. Why?
Because we are common. Reality television looks for people who have over-the-top personalities, and I don’t have that. My girls are silly and say funny things, but everyone’s kid does that. My family is not entertainment, but it is reality for many people. It’s interesting how in reality television we want to capture real experiences that we will later turn off. True reality … is what’s in front of us.
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I think that’s why my blog is readable for some, because they can relate to what I talk about. When I talk about the frustrations of getting rid of a pacifier, potty training, or spilling three cups of milk in ten minutes, many of you that read know exactly what I’m talking about. When I relive moments of sleep deprivation from the newborn stage or changing sixteen diapers a day, many parents, especially twin parents, know exactly where I’m headed.
I think it’s unfortunate that TV personalities get shows that highlight how crazy or irresponsible someone is. You can’t take them seriously when they try to do something serious and if they are not the exact person that people see on TV, then are they truly reality on TV? I think a lot of people hope to get noticed at some point or another. I know for me, it may not happen, and I’m ok with that.
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It’s important in those times to remember to be the person you were meant to be, not the person you get noticed the most by. Furthermore, if you are one of the select few that gets chosen and you have a camera following you around every moment of the day, you are going to do things that get questioned constantly. When people know they are on camera all the time, they do goofy things. Look at all the teenage stars that have grown up and appear crazy to a reasonable person. Continuing with this, look at all the people that shouldn’t have had a camera on them in the first place but are on shows because they are different from the “normal” population. Unfortunately, most people have at least one family member they think may qualify for this category.
People can’t handle that level of scrutiny on a consistent basis. I don’t want someone to think that I make for a poor father because I say the occasional thing I shouldn’t say when frustrated, or when I run to the window just so I can fart in privacy without two toddlers yelling “Daddy tooted!”. I’m not giving my kids “go-go juice”, and I’m not leaving them places … I guess you could say reality television, in a sense, makes us feel a little better about ourselves.
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Having said all of this, television is a huge industry, and it’s very helpful in the right capacities. The guy who reached out to me didn’t have to…he probably hears from thousands of people consistently trying to get themselves exposed on TV, so I’m honored to have even corresponded with someone who has a hand in making those programs. I understand why they do what they do, it’s primarily for entertainment, and let’s face it, there’s boatloads of money to be made in television, advertisements, and sponsors. But the fact remains that it can make one lose sight of who they are. We aren’t a show, we’re a family. Even though it will never get us on television, it makes us happy. Peace, love and joy for the holidays, y’all.
This post originally appeared at Twin Dad Talks
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Photo: tinkerbrad/Flickr
Because of my blog, I was contacted a few years ago to see if I’d be interested in going on a show similar to the “wife-swap” shows. But this one was for pastors and their wives. I said no.
Gary, thanks for reading. It’s kind of interesting to think that someone could get approached like that, but the reality is that they are always looking for the next personality that people will talk about, regardless of whether they are a positive or negative influence on others. I’m sure you’re glad that your opportunity for reality TV fell through.