A YOUTHFUL PLUNDER
The most important aspect of society is mentorship, guidance, and wisdom from elders. These lessons are supposed to come from those who live life.
What happens when men in society abandon the role of elders?
What happens when men in society see all women as eligible bachelorettes?
The result is older men sliding back to act like teenagers. I am surprised how many times I see a 45-year-old getting hammered with a 21-year-old frat boy. I am shocked how many times I see 50-year-olds shopping at Forever 21.
Everyone around me tells me 40 is the new 30. More tell me 37 is the age of a baby.
This attitude is like the Religion of Positive Thinking. I wrote about that earlier. Completely delusional.
The most important aspect of society is mentorship, guidance, and wisdom from elders. These lessons are supposed to come from those who live life.
Believing statements doesn’t make them true. Sometimes those who believe feel good statements have positive results. Positive results don’t have anything to do with the belief. Results are action based. Process based.
Yes, emotional states are a factor. They help. Helping is not the same as doing.
Humans age and proceed through life. As we progress, we enter new phases. These new phases are needed. Progress helps everyone be the best version of themselves. If everyone plays their role society improves. We help everyone when we accept this fact.
What happens when men ditch this role to be self-serving?
I’ll tell you.
A REAL-LIFE BAR TENDER CONVERSATION
Yesterday I sat at a bar. My bar tender was 19 years old. I am turning 37 years old this year.
I struck up a conversation which led into her relationship past. Our conversation included all types of history. We discused stories about her family, her friends, and even romantic relationships.
I am very good at Active Listening.
Active Listening is when a person seeks to understand what is being told to them. This means the listener will ask questions. These questions enable the listener to summarize what the talker communicated to create understanding.
Every time she shared an intimate detail with me, I was grateful. The little bit of trust she gave me was very valuable. I try my best to take care of things which have value.
Eventually we got to a point where I could tell no heterosexual man ever demonstrated honest, caring affection which was non-sexual in nature. It is such an important concept for fathers to teach their daughters. She didn’t know what this was.
She was struggling with her boyfriend and reconciling contradictions.
I reached over. I looked at her. Then I asked her, “Have you ever been touched by a heterosexual man who was not your family, and honestly just cared about you?’
She paused.
She then answered, “No.”
I looked at her. I breathed a sigh. Then I said, “Give me your hand”
Her face softened. She offered her hand. I reached out. I held it with one hand and put another hand over her. I smiled at her. She smiled back.
I asked her, “How does this feel?”
She responded, “It feels comfortable. I feel safe. It feels good.”
I then said, “Good. Take your hand back.”
She did.
Then I said, “Now I’m going to show you the difference. Give me your hand back.”
She did.
I held it again. This time it was different.
Then I asked, “How does this feel.”
She said, “Uncomfortable and weird.”
I said, “Now you know the difference.”
A man who fails to teach this lesson to his daughter fails his daughter immensely in life.
She almost cried. She gave me a hug and thanked me. She told me she realized not in two years had her boyfriend ever held her hand the way I did.
THE IMPORTANCE OF MEN TEACHING DAUGHTER ELIGIBLE WOMEN NOT F***ING THEM
It’s essential for fathers to shower their daughters with appropriate physical affection. When girls experience appropriate nonsexual touching these actions elevate their self-confidence, self-esteem, and aides them in proper discernment.
Discernment which has this ingredient baked into it allows women to distinguish true love from men who touch them for lust or manipulation.
A man who fails to teach this lesson to his daughter fails his daughter immensely in life.
THE PRIMARY MISSION OF THIS OLDER MALE
I make it my primary mission in life to teach this to my daughter every day. As a result of my affection my daughter does wonders. She is extremely confident, beaming with happiness, loves her body and has a very high self-esteem.
Ideally the young lady serving me could be my daughter. I am basically 18 years older than her. I have some friends who had children at 18.
People are adults at 18. It’s the legal age. There’s a reason for it to exist. I don’t treat 18-year-old people like children. I treat them like adults. Period.
It’s silly to do it any other way.
At this point in my life I feel obligated to society. I want to provide guidance and advice. Specifically for those younger than me. This includes young women. This is not because I feel like I have so much to teach. I am obligated to teach people my mistakes to help them avoid errors I made.
In the bartender’s case a man failed to teach his daughter. She is the age where she could be my daughter. Despite whatever she looks like I rather teach her than fuck her. Sorry for being crude. I see her as an adult not a child. None the less our relationship should be reflective of our positions.
Nothing is more exceptional than a man who does not succumb to his selfish impulses.
This is my mindset. This is the mindset men should have in society as they age.
If I can do something to spare people heart ache, pain, and consequences I am going to try. Be it woman or man. Gender is irrelevant.
I do not need to be family to people to want the best possible outcome for them.
SOCIETY GETS BETTER & SO DO YOU BY MAKING THESE CHOICES
Men. When you make decisions like this you become the best type of person. Forget being a better man for second. You become a better person. There is a difference.
Men all crave respect.
What more respect could you earn from women than being known to be a person like this?
To obtain what you want you must become what the want is attracted to. You cannot simply do to get the things you want. You must become what the thing the what is attracted to. It does not work any other way.
Women crave men of integrity, high morals, great values, and those who stand apart from others. Women crave exceptionalism. Other men will draw to you as well.
Nothing is more exceptional than a man who does not succumb to his selfish impulses.
You cannot simply say this. You cannot simply show it off when it matters. You must do it away from the spotlight. In football my coach always used to say it’s about what you do “away from the ball”.
Similar, if you are to impress the woman you really need you must do it away from her. You must do it when she is not there to witness. You must do it when you know she will never be around to know.
When you behave this way, you become what it is people seek. The issue with this process for many is it requires humility. Ego prevents people from becoming what it is everyone wants.
There is no one there to witness exceptional acts. That is what it is to be exceptional.
There can be no fame for exceptionalism. I promise the woman you really need will recognize your exceptionalism. Remember wants are different from needs. Become the man women need. Don’t try and show them you are the man they want. You will be ignored. Trust me on that.
To your knowledge success!
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About Christopher: Christopher Knight Lopez is a Professional Hustler turned International Best Seller and Published Author of “I Made It Then I Didn’t”. Christopher has opened over 7 businesses in his 15-year career. Christopher’s purpose is to take advantage of various market-driven opportunities. Christopher is a certified Master Project Manager (MPM), and Accredited Financial Analyst (AFA). Christopher previously held his Series 65 securities license examination and was a Master Financial Planner (MFP). Christopher also held his General Lines — Life, Accident, Health & HMO. Christopher has managed a combined 286mm USD in reported Assets Under Management & Assets Under Advisement. Christopher has work experience in 33 countries, raised over 50mm USD for various businesses, and grossed over 13.0mm in his personal career. Christopher worked in the highly technical industries of: biotechnology, finance, securities, manufacturing, real estate, and residential mortgages. Christopher is a United States Air Force Veteran. Christopher has a passion for family, competitive sports, fishing, martial arts and advocacy for entrepreneurs. Christopher provides self-help classes for up-and-coming entrepreneurs. Christopher’s passion to mentor comes from belief that entrepreneurs need guidance. The world is full of conflicting information about entrepreneur identity. See more at www.christopherklopez.com.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
 White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism |
 Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box |
 The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer |
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Photo credit: iStockPhoto.com
