Rejection from the one you most desire is heart-wrenching and hard to accept. So much invested time and effort of this blissful torture were wasted on unrealistic views and sleepless nights. Your emotional highs and lows were dependent and dictated by an acknowledgment or interaction and the illusions of pure perfection were blindly magnified and worshipped, which ignored the imperfections, faults, and vulnerabilities of your love interest. Yet, the worst part of it all is that the obsessive and all-consuming experience is far from over. Breaking free from a spell, or a curse, may feel impossible, but it is doable. Here are some suggestions to steer you in the right direction:
- We all have our types and standards
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and if you don’t fit the mold, then it’s time to move on. It just means that he or she is just not into you the very same way you are not into others. However, don’t let the rejection discourage you. There are other fishes in the sea. - No means no
If you still cannot take no for an answer, just know that it is an unwanted advance in case you are wondering. Think of it as an equivalent to sexual misconduct or harassment. - Have respect for yourself
Mutual respect is important between two people, even if it is strictly platonic, but it is equally crucial to have respect for yourself. Being a creepy stalker guy or gal is not an attractive look. If you do not appreciate the disrespect from some random weirdo, then stop embarrassing yourself. - Distance yourself
A healthy boundary is necessary. It is not to say that you cannot hang out with the object of your affections, but if it becomes increasingly unhealthy, then put some space between the both of you. Also, pull back your resources if you have been giving in forms of monetary or material gifts. - Invest in yourself
Give yourself what you foolishly gave to someone who was not interested in you. Love yourself to the fullest, because no one could love you better than yourself. - Keep it moving
Life is not over. It goes on. Live and learn, but enjoy it too! - Seek professional help
If all else fails, then talk to a therapist. There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting medical treatment.
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This post was previously published on Hello, Love and is republished here with permission from the author.
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Photo credit: Masaki Araya