Not that looking good for your age is bad, but I don’t want them to just be judging me by the lack of wrinkles on my face. While I may still want them to look me up and down and see how healthy I became and remained, I want them to also look into my eyes and into my soul and say the same thing.
I want them to see my growth emotionally and mentally. I want them to see a change in me for the better.
Not that I was a horrible person. But emotionally I was stunted for years. Mentally, I was a mess.
I want people to know that in spite of growing up as I had—abused, sheltered and a flower in the attic—I have been able to overcome my challenges placed on me by others as well as myself.
I think it’s a shame when you see someone you haven’t seen for a decade or two and they’re the same, damned person you knew back then. They haven’t changed a bit … internally.
Sure, they look a heck of a lot different on the outside, but maybe that’s the thing. There is a circular way of one’s health: mentally feeling poorly and therefore treating yourself physically poorly. And this cycle continues.
You know these types.
They’re decades into their marriage (or their third) and they still think they’re single. They still try to pick physical fights with people. They still pound back the drinks. They waste their money and can’t cover their bills. They still believe in conspiracy theories and disproved superstitions. They still blame others for their mishaps and mistakes. They are still bitter about the hand that random life events gave them years ago. They are essentially gray-haired teenagers.
I don’t mean to fault any and all shortcomings, as we all have them, but there is a time to eventually set aside childish ways.
We will all make mistakes and have accidents throughout our lives (even to our dying day), but each day should be an opportunity to grow and change.
I hope that every year I’m slightly different—and better—than had been the previous. It’s 2017 and I hope that I am becoming a more mature, rational, kinder man.
Maybe when I haven’t seen you in a few years, and no matter how much you might have visually changed, I hope that when I see your heart, I’m able to exclaim how much you had changed within!
Photo: Getty Images