New Year, New Me

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I won’t pick up that first beer.

I will wake up at five thirty in the morning and go for a run three times a week.

I will keep my temper in check.

I will lose twenty pounds.

I will try to mend my relationships.

I am finally going to finish that novel buried on my hard drive.

Or maybe not.

This is how it goes come the first of every new year. I make promises to myself, and I don’t keep them. I don’t come even close to keeping them. Ever.

So, this year I am going to do something different. I’m not promising to do sh*t.

And I think everyone else should do the same. Here’s why:

If we were serious about making a change in our lifestyle, health, financial goals, relationships, etc., we wouldn’t need a calendar to enact those changes. We would have started yesterday. So instead of making New Year’s Resolutions this year, instead let’s just double down on the things we’re already half-a**ed doing. Let’s double down on humanity.

When you see someone broken down, take the time and stop to see if they need help.

If you’re part of a group, stay off your phone.

If someone asks you for your spare change, give it to them. What’s it really going to hurt?

Take the extra minute of your day to reach out to someone whom you haven’t heard from in awhile. Just ask if they’re OK.

Answer your phone when someone calls. They probably don’t like talking on the phone either, but felt it was important enough to call.

Return emails and texts.

Don’t stand people up-when you make plans, follow through.

Don’t cheat, on anyone or anything.

Mean what you say.

If your neighbor needs help, lend a hand.

Write someone a letter. You know, those things that take a few days to get where they’re going.

In a world where we stare at screens for eighteen hours a day, we need to learn to get out and reconnect with our fellow humans. If we all took a few seconds out of each day to make small changes we would see the world around us rapidly begin to shape into something new. It’s time to bring back a sense of community, compassion, and decency toward each other.

Also, instead of adding new things to our to do’s and new lists of things to read or learn, let’s just make sure we strengthen what the previous year has taught us. The following are three of the biggest lessons I’ve had reiterated in my life recently.

Friendship, the true kind of friendship, the kind that can overcome distance, disagreements, and time should be cherished. Perform regular maintenance on these relationships, friends, because trust me, they are few and far between.

Do something you love. Life is short, so don’t waste it going into work every day and hating every moment you’re there. Find something that gives you a sense of purpose, and makes you happy along the way.

Cognitive Dissonance is real, and we should do all we can to get outside our comfort zones and change our own biases. Just because we do not agree with something, doesn’t make that point of view wrong. The #MeToo movement was a prime example of how powerful dissonance can be. When something challenges our beliefs, we shouldn’t buck against it, but rather try to understand it.

I believe that if we start doing a few, small, simple things, the big ones will fall into place. By living more meaningful lives at a basic level, we will see a boost in productivity that will make the need for New Year’s resolutions obsolete.

And who knows, after a year of focussing on the small, I might actually publish that novel.

Or not.

Same me, new world.

#WordsThatMatter