Office Phrases Adjusted for Every CEO to Sound Incredibly Important

We need out-of-the-box ideas, so please get your ideas from a box.

Boxes are so important for creativity. We need all of our ideas to come from a box. Cardboard boxes. Plastic boxes. Shoe boxes. It doesn’t matter, as long as it’s from a box. Also, it would be great for creativity if you emerge from the box too. In fact, out-of-the-box ideas ABOUT boxes?! Those are the most creative.

Let’s go for the low-hanging fruit because apples are good for you.

We need to go for the low-hanging fruit and, ironically, I saw some apples hanging from the tree outside the office. We’re going to cancel our all-hands meeting so that we can all head down and grab those low-hanging apples by the bushel.

I’m chairing this meeting but I’m going to table this item for later.

I’m saying this because I read in a business leadership publication (actually, it was the Ikea website) that it’s important to incorporate pieces of furniture into workplace language so that your employees know what you’re talking about.

We need to go back to the drawing board, so it’s your turn in our Pictionary game.

Wendy — please go back to the board and draw us a decent picture this time. We couldn’t guess your last picture and our team is losing here.

Get your ducks in a row because orderly ducks are shown in 9 out 10 studies to increase worker productivity.

Having orderly ducks is synonymous with being a productive employee. Wait, John, are you saying that you don’t have any ducks? Pack up your things, then, because we’re letting you go.

This is a real game changer for us…in Pictionary.

I’m not talking about new ideas or initiatives. I just mean that our team just took the lead in Pictionary, so it’s literally a game changer. Great job, team!

We need to incentivize, advertise and capitalize our ROIs and KPIs, while we eat French fries, and whoever tries will win the grand prize.

Wait, what? Documenting our company’s KPIs to the board of directors? No, I thought I was just making rap music here.

This is our window of opportunity to create a paradigm shift with an innovative approach.

I expect you to know what I mean here, even though I have no idea what I’m saying here. All I know is we need to grab our boxes, our apples and, especially, our ducks.