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Many of you returned to school this week. For most, I can only imagine how difficult it was. I would be very surprised if countless numbers of you were not scared, emotionally upset, anxious, depressed, fearful, ill at ease, having bad dreams, confused, just plain unhappy or experiencing any combination of these and other emotions. It’s only natural.
Some of you don’t feel ready to return yet. That is understandable as well.
What’s most important is to acknowledge and accept your emotions. We are all ‘built’ differently and consequently handle events, particularly so violent and emotional ones in different ways. There is no right or wrong, weak or strong, better or worse. Just different.
You found yourselves in a horrifying situation. No one can undo the damage and loss of life. It’s tragic, unacceptable and can’t be rectified.
What you can control is how you decide to handle this unconscionable experience in your conscious and move forward with your lives. Right now, it’s still so raw and many of you are coping as best you can.
As time passes, the vivid memories of this experience will begin to recede. You won’t forget it. You will find yourself more emotionally equipped to handle and use it to ‘inform’ your life, emotions and actions moving forward.
Many of you have seen mental health professionals to help you cope. That’s great and what they are there for. Support comes in many forms. It might be a psychologist, guidance counselor, parent, psychiatrist, social worker, aunt or uncle, best friend or anyone in whom you are confident in confiding.
It’s so much better to talk and express your feelings than to cover them up. To the guys who are reading this, a special note: In my generation, many males were brought up with the idea that communicating fears and concerns was a sign of weakness. The reality is that just the opposite is true.
Both males and females—everyone benefits from acknowledging their emotions and if they are comfortable they share them. I think your generation understands this a bit better than mine but there may still be some dinosaurs out there who think keeping your feelings to yourself is a sign of strength.
Don’t buy into their erroneous and outdated thinking. The strongest people are those who acknowledge their fears. In fact, if you think about it, how can you deal with something difficult if you try to ignore how it makes you feel.
All of you have seen the support from across the nation and the concern of everyone—young people and adults— for all you have been through. You know you are in people’s thoughts and prayers. Perhaps this helps a bit, perhaps not.
As you move forward remember, everything you are experiencing from that horrible event on February 14th is a natural reaction.
There is something more I want to mention. It’s so important. It won’t take away from that terrible day but it does show that students have incredible power to affect the politics of our country. It doesn’t matter if you consider yourself a Republican, Democrat, Libertarian or any other party. You, students of Marjory Stoneham Douglas High School, have not only moved the nation, you have created a new political reality.
You have demonstrated that students—not even of voting age—have the ability to move politicians to action. Together with students from around the nation you have mobilized and forced a real dialog about gun control.
There have been other horrific shootings in our country’s history. They usually generate some talk or temporary action but nothing more. This time you can make it different!
As young people, the future of our great nation is yours! You deserve the right to make your views known, whatever they may be.
Some of you may be against guns, period. Others of you grew up with them, have used them and believe in the right to carry them. All of us hear about protecting 2nd Amendment rights almost every day. Perhaps your parents are members of the NRA. Talk to them. You might be surprised to learn that various polls indicate that somewhere between 50-79% of NRA members support background checks! It may be that you and your parents don’t agree on all aspects of gun control. That’s O.K. You have the right to your views and to be heard.
People are listening. Unfortunately, many from the generations born before you hesitate to take action. Too many Congressmen are afraid they will lose votes if they take any stance that opposes the NRA. Many of these same people take large contributions from the NRA.
It’s my personal belief that as American citizens we have the right to own guns. But, as you are becoming adults, recognize that is a ‘nuanced belief.’ By that I mean, you can believe in the right to bear arms and also believe in making certain that only people who have gone through a detailed background check should have access to them. You can believe in the right to bear arms, but not in semi-automatic assault weapons. That’s my view, it doesn’t have to be yours.
As you move forward, become aware of all the issues of interest to you and become involved – no matter what side of the issue you fall on. And remember, everyone is entitled to have their opinion. You may not agree with it, but tolerate, allow and listen to it!
March 24th will be a historic day in the history of this country as so many of you gather in Washington to express your views on gun control. Let your voices be heard. The whole world is watching and you have power. Use it!!
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As a follow-up to this piece, you’ll like this, also by Dave Kanegis:
Enough is Enough, #NeverAgain
Are you ready to talk about change or fight for it?
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What’s your take on what you just read? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.
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